My unconscious other self
“Do not say that, dear Dectar.
Your gifts are very great.
Did not my Mother and Father tell about your great powers and your wisdom?
Have you not cured the sick, have you not been at the sickbeds, and have you not called back the dying?
Have you not stopped the panther when he was about to pounce upon his prey, a young child?
Have you not prevented the fight between the lion and the tiger by your will and power?
My Mother, dear Dectar, told me that you did all that, and that your wisdom is great.
You know the things growing on the fields, darkness does not enter you, it is always light in your deep inner self.
What more do you want?
Now, dear Dectar, I see how old you are, but especially how young the feelings are which want to possess all those powers.
You are longing for greatness of spirit, for life, love, and you want to get to know that depth.
When I am ready, for I know now what I am here for, dear Dectar, I will help you.
Then you will receive what your heart is yearning for, but I will help you with that.
Indeed, Dectar, your wing is paralysed, but have no fear. I have already taken steps.
Nobody will hear us and disturb our being one.
Do not hesitate to look to the right, left, and on high; my cell is empty and locked.
Those forces are in me; I am aware of that now.
I also know what danger is threatening us.
At this moment, dear Dectar, I am talking from my deep inner life.
This is the other and unconscious ‘consciousness’, Dectar, which I once possessed.
However, I am now living in another organism and this body, my friend, has yet to reach adulthood.
You were searching, dear Dectar.
You have rudely disturbed my inner life and peace.
Now I am quite open and talk to you.
But from where, Dectar?
Who is it who is now talking to you?
You played a dangerous game, my friend, do not do that again, otherwise our bond will be severed, and the wisdom you are longing for will be changed into ignorance.
Your perception is immaculate, dear Dectar, but this feeling and these desires ask for destruction.
As I entered, you already begged for possession and you no longer thought of all those laws, which make you shiver and tremble.
You forget what life you are living, my friend.
But I tell you, do not go too far. You know that I see through you, and that I can follow your inner life.
Do not force me, Dectar, to use my powers, to bind you hand and foot so that your strong will dissolves into ‘nothingness’.
During my sleep, you tried to get to know everything. You have heard my answer now.
Leave me alone, dear Dectar. I watch over myself and will go on watching.
It is true that I need your help, but there is still other help, which exposes itself as warmth within me.
Wait, Dectar, have patience, I do not want my task to be disturbed nor do I want to feel another will which dominates me.
Centuries passed by, dear Dectar.
Now I am living on earth again and I must finish my task.
In that other life I perished.
In the depth of my soul resides the secret, the ‘why and what for’ I am here, but I shall get to know it, though in another way than you did.
You know my previous life, Dectar, as well as yours and you know now who I am.
Now that I have been here for a few days, you already want me to come to you.
Dectar, you are a plaything of your own desires.
Centuries ago you were my pupil, you followed me in everything, and I taught you to attune yourself.
You received power and strength to see through things, and love which you changed into grief.
You have defiled your mother’s grave by the poison you administered to her only to satisfy your hunger and quench your thirst, but that is why you perished.
Of course, Dectar, you have made up and you are aware of that, but I ask you: Have you forgotten all this?
I live, Dectar, and I am the person you are looking for and you know that now.
You also know that I can bridge all those depths in my soul, but that I do not allow any disturbance in the process.
Are you prepared to wait, Dectar, until I am ready?
Only then shall I help you, and do you get to know the new laws which are only intended for those who follow the path through our life, and are willing to serve ‘God’ who gave all of us life.
Go now, dear Dectar, leave me alone, I need time to recover.
Go, my friend, control your inner life, and appear in another less transparent garment.
Believe me, Dectar, if there was no other help, both of us would be lost.
Nothing, nothing, dear Dectar, you will tell the person called Venry.
Within a few years, I shall be ready, then you will receive wisdom, which is unknown here.
Now you are my pupil, presently my master again, and you will remain so for the time being.
However, when I perish, Dectar, you will perish with me, you will have to wait for centuries before you will see her.
This consciousness will fall asleep again, Dectar, the Venry will return, you know that I live in his soul and am part of it.
The Venry, dear Dectar, will not yet be allowed to know about all this.”
Dectar came for me.
I had rested wonderfully and he entered my cell.
I did not know anything about what had been said.
“Are we going to the masters, Dectar?”
“Yes, Venry, and you must answer the questions properly and clearly.
Your concentration will be tested, so be very calm.”
However, when I wanted to follow him Dectar received a message from space and said: “Wait for me here, Venry.”
His eyes pierced mine before he left.
Was he being followed?
Why was he called away?
I shivered; this message received from space frightened me.
So there was danger?
When I thought of that I felt the warmth again.
I subsequently got feelings and I understood what I should do.
I should not think of anything, only of myself; thus were the orders and the thoughts which came over me.
The laws of this Temple awakened in me and forced themselves on me this very moment.
Dectar came back and said: “I think too much about myself, Venry, we must be very serious.”
I perceived that he leaned over to the left, he walked with a limp just because he was afraid.
“We are going for a walk, Venry, our visit to the masters has been postponed.”