Marianne’s end on earth
Again I found myself at the place where I had been born.
My research would begin here.
I immediately recognised this area.
My childhood years had passed here.
I found myself in the wood where I had played with Marianne.
Before me I saw my parent’s grave.
I only saw two skeletons but I knew who they were.
I would not shed a tear here, I could not have done it and did not feel the need for it either.
These skeletons were strange to me just as they had been strange to me when they still lived in their happiness.
What is man and how much disaster man can create!
How powerful he is and how mean, but also how stupid!
Here before me lay the earthly understanding.
These skeletons belonged to those who had wanted to make me a ruler.
They had ruled and how they ruled.
‘Rest in peace, you people, I have forgiven you everything and do not bear any hate towards you, but love you because you do not know what you did.
You behaved like little children would behave.’
Now they were dead, but the life had left and I knew where it lived.
God loved us but we did not love Him.
Man cursed his God and they destroyed each other.
Dead and yet alive, children of eternity!
They would come back to earth again, but probably separated.
How wonderful it was to see them again and how grateful I could be to God for it.
I could not weep, but I sent my loving thoughts to them.
After all, they did not know any better.
They had been rich, but poor in feeling.
What were earthly riches?
My parents had never lived as they should have lived.
I had even more parents and I now started to understand what being a father and mother meant.
Farewell, children of eternity, God bless your paths!
I stayed in this place for a long time, but I felt that I had to carry on.
At the place where Marianne had lived I felt that Emschor connected me.
At the same moment I had perception and before me I saw Marianne.
It was during the time when I had left.
They also had to leave the very same day.
They were chased away and I understood this scene.
I saw clearly that they were preparing to leave.
People thought that they had spoilt me.
Fortunately they escaped the torture chamber.
God had protected them, as me.
Yet I felt another effect in it.
Was I feeling this clearly?
Oh, it could not be any different.
‘Master’, I said, because it was he who had protected them from it, ‘how can I thank you, how wonderful you are.’
Poor people!
They were soon ready and left for another town or village.
I followed them.
I was connected to the past again.
I had already borne my love which I now felt for Marianne within me as a child.
She also felt as I did, we were both searching and longed for that one, that great and sacred love.
Yet we were unconscious, because the past lay hidden deep within us.
My love grew with every step which removed them from my parental home.
Her thoughts entered me which she had felt at that time.
She loved me in child-like simplicity.
How amazing this connection also was.
Her parents were sad because they had to leave, yet happiness lay within them, because they had remained alive.
They pitched up tents in another place, it was a small village, in order to start a new life.
One scene now followed another.
I saw that Marianne grew up and the older she became the more her character and personality developed.
Her parents were afraid, because frivolity lay within her.
She was a beautiful apparition and she had a great and powerful feeling for art.
She also had a beautiful voice.
The older she became the more conscious these capacities became and I heard her beautiful singing, which trembled deep in my soul.
I saw that she left her parental home at the age of twenty-one.
She left in silence, into the wide world, she wanted to gain fame and honour.
Intellect from previous lives lay within her being.
All those powers and gifts were conscious, which she built upon and developed her voice.
A powerful will lay within her to make something beautiful of her art.
She strived for one goal, which I had also strived for: fame, happiness and love.
Our paths were one, this was remarkable.
From this place I followed her life, from city to city.
She plunged from one frivolity into another.
Yet she remained simple, her origin and birth could not be denied.
That human power led her into the most unpleasant situations and as a result of her recklessness she got to know life.
It brought her nothing but sorrow and suffering.
Her beauty led her into temptation, it brought her earthly happiness and repose.
The years flew past in this way.
However, she also continued to search and could not find what she longed for so much.
An unknown power drove her to one place, which she knew nothing about, felt or understood.
How can it be, I thought.
I felt that she was driven to me, driven on by the power of the past, a cosmic law, which the people on earth understood nothing of.
Here before me I saw and understood this law.
I saw that she settled near to the area where I lived.
Oh, if only I had known that!
It was now clear to me that man is driven on by invisible powers.
However, those powers and forces had received a connection in the past, had passed over into each other and were torn apart again, to be connected again, after all.
This outlook into the depth of the past which was granted to me was great.
How different everything could have been if I had met her before.
However, nothing more could be changed about that.
It had to happen.
Now I understood why all those thoughts had come to me when I had started her statue.
She had influenced me from a far distance, but she did that involuntarily and I was not conscious of it either.
Yet we had been connected.
I saw the inspiration in it at a far distance and understood that I was being lived through her.
These laws were deep, which an artist on earth was not conscious of.
I sculpted the woman I loved and she lived close in my vicinity.
It is almost incredible, I thought, but I had to accept it.
How intense human thoughts were.
I wanted to get to know all these powers and I would not forget this.
I thought about her day and night at that time.
I now understood everything.
It was amazing.
I came back to her own life and saw that she was like all those other women whom I had got to know on earth.
If I had met her in this situation, I would immediately have turned away from her and left.
I thanked God that I was saved from that.
It would have destroyed my love for her.
Was this Marianne?
I now also understood her begging not to ask about her life, because she had sound reason for that.
Yet I had loved her, because she was mine.
One day we would be united.
My cycle of the earth came to an end and hers would also end.
Sooner or later it would be at that stage and we would be one for eternity.
I could forgive her everything, now that I knew what my own life was like.
Something kept me connected to her and that was the past.
It was shown to me in ancient Egypt and now I was very grateful for it.
How beautiful my Marianne was!
Her golden blond hair, her healthy facial colour and shining eyes gave her this beauty.
However, what is the human being who does not know himself and forgets himself?
What is earthly beauty, if the inner feelings pass into the material life?
She forgot herself, because she did not know herself.
Only in another life would she get to know herself.
Now I found it necessary that she would come back, because she would awaken in that life.
However, how deep everything was now that I knew this and understood it completely.
What is the human being if he sullies these laws of nature and violates his beautiful body?
I felt it not only as a curse, but the human being provoked Him, his God, who had given him this beautiful body.
How great this mercy already was to possess this, because many people were deformed and lacking.
I hated my friend Roni because he sullied his beautiful body.
He was like an Adonis, but inside like an animal.
Marianne had surrendered to him, she was spoilt, but also provoked and scoffed at.
Other people sullied her beauty which had been sacred to me.
No, at that time we did not belong to each other, we would not have understood each other.
She could not feel the greatness of my love, only God knew that it was not yet time and so what appeared necessary happened.
I saw and felt for the first time now that Marianne could not have given me the highest inspiration and it would have been a shock to me if I had experienced that.
Now I thanked God that I had not met her before.
I could now forgive Roni, I no longer hated him and I loved Marianne, she was my twin soul and he had become my brother.
I felt one with Marianne, one in soul, and we would stay that way forever.
This was a cosmic law, God wanted it, this was determined in the universe.
I could not yet sense the depth of this problem, but I accepted it, because this feeling of longing lay within me.
When she lived there so near in my vicinity, she also thought about her childhood and her love for me awakened.
Then she thought that she had found that love in Roni, but this was not the case.
Before me I now saw an awe-inspiring problem and I felt that the three of us were connected.
The spiritual mystery closed in firmly and the connection became deeper.
Three souls were on earth for a particular purpose and would meet each other there again.
Whatever happened - because it was a law and we experienced that law - we could not avoid it.
I felt myself shiver, because this was so amazing.
We were sent to one point on this great earth in order to meet each other.
It was the case, because Roni and Marianne and I had experienced it.
Thousands of people experienced something similar, but only on this side did they get to know these laws.
Here, in this life, miracles and problems dissolved, we passed over into them.
It was wonderful to be able to follow all of this.
I also understood that everyone had to experience his own life, but that one, which concerned the three of us, we were all involved in it.
We were connected to many other beings, got to know life on earth through people, did good and evil, as a result of which our characters started to change.
From animal to human being, from spirit to God, the human being had to travel that path.
In the earthly body the soul lived it up completely, but yet earthly life served in order to master our spiritual possession, pure and spiritual love.
One person learned form another, but all of these people were guided and controlled by one power and that was God, the Creator of man and animal and all other life.
His attunement lay in the human being, a flame which burned eternally, but which the human being extinguished.
The human being had - I saw and felt all of this - received the highest, but people had to master that sacred love.
Roni and I, also Marianne, would be connected in this way.
Roni would one day receive his love as every other person.
I could not fathom out the power which had brought us together, but would not want to either, because I felt respect.
People had to bow their heads to something wonderful.
I suddenly thought about her situation again; she was carrying life.
A young being was inside her when I was taken to my dungeon.
Had she carried this young being to the end?
The scenes followed each other, one scene after another became hazy.
Then I saw the scene before me when she came to visit me in my dungeon, then I saw the scene when I was sentenced and she was sick.
At the same time as I saw this, I got the answer, which I had thought about a moment ago.
No, the shock had been too great.
The young life had gone back to where it had come to and in her.
Thank God, I thought.
Yet, if this had been necessary, I would now have given into everything.
All these truths for man were so powerful, it would strengthen the soul in this way if people knew why and for what purpose, that people distanced themselves from everything.
Then I saw another scene and I understood that she was better.
What would she do now?
I continued to follow her and I saw that she went back to my studio and accepted what I had offered her.
Her own statue and mine, which I had once made for myself, and many other statues were packed in and so she went on her journey.
Where would she go?
However, I soon understood where she was going.
This was the best solution, since her life and mine were in pieces anyway.
Broken in heart and soul she went back to her parents.
She had gone back as a humble person and bowed her head.
She had discarded her frivolity.
She had taken all my possessions and many statues were given a place in her vicinity.
Her parents were extremely happy and had received their child with open arms.
Marianne spent her life in loneliness and in silence.
Her personality was crippled, but she gave me her love.
She felt for me as I for her.
She became conscious outside in nature.
Life had broken her heart, but inside something awakened which came to me in my cell and had shook my feelings awake.
I had longed for her, it had eaten away at me and those thoughts were also hers.
I saw and felt a miracle of the power of thought again.
Love knew no distance, because we were one, without knowing it.
We only had still to awaken, so that our love would become stronger and more conscious and grow into something beautiful and exalted.
Only then would it be spiritual, then our love would be pure and would reach even further than sister and brother love.
See, I only saw and felt and learned that now that the past was revealed to me, the veil of an event was lifted.
The silence which I had felt in my dungeon was her silence.
Outside her love developed, her environment was the past, because her own statue and next to it mine were around her.
She stayed in this place for hours and she spoke to me.
‘If only my soul was so white’, I heard her say, ‘as this snow-white marble, which he made me from.
Lantos, my Lantos, oh, how you must suffer!
Can your forgive me?
If you know everything, can you still love me then?
If God can hear me, then He will know that I love only you, have always loved you.
Lantos, can you be mine?
Oh, how I long for it!
What is it that you have placed in me?
I feel your silence, all your sorrow and suffering and yet I cannot and may not visit you.
Yonder you are alone, you suffer and are broken.
I can feel it, oh, I know it, because I can see you in my dream.
Sometimes I can feel you really deeply, but then you shake me off you and do not want anything from me.
Therefore, Lantos, I ask you: do you love me?
Oh, how I can love you!
I will await my death and then I can tell you everything.
You will not remain alive for long.
May God give you the strength to be able to endure this.
I am your unhappiness, I am the person who showered this unhappiness upon you, yet I ask God for forgiveness.
Lantos, Lantos, forgive me!’
Then she collapsed.
How I had loved her!
Tears rolled down my cheeks.
Love, my God, how beautiful, how sacred that pure feeling is.
She felt my love for her in her statue and in my own statue.
Her longing for this great happiness became deeper and deeper.
She longed for what I had prayed for when she had come to visit me in my dungeon, and this longing dominated her life.
Whatever she thought about, one power of feeling dominated everything and this was a burning feeling, the longing to be able to possess love.
Yet she only longed for that love which carries, which feels that pure happiness.
Did she feel herself awakening?
The years passed and she wasted away.
Other images now followed each other and I saw that her parents passed over one by one.
Marianne was now alone.
Her material body became wrinkled and her physical powers lessened by the day, but her inner self grew.
It became stronger and more beautiful, because her love did that.
Yet she reached a good age and she was only a shadow of her former beauty.
Her end was approaching in this way.
In her will she asked to be buried with her statue and mine.
She was convinced that she would appear before her God, because a strong faith now lay within her.
Then I saw her deathbed.
She passed away in silence.
Her last thoughts were devoted to me and she also thought that she would see me again one day.
No, Marianne, I thought, it is not yet our time.
We will see each other again, but only centuries later.
She passed away, but the longing lay within her to be able to receive this great thing.
Her earthly life was also over.
Our statues will be excavated one day.
One day, because I see that they have not yet been found.
Then people will be able to get a glimpse of the past.
I could make a prediction at the moment, but I know that people will not accept that.
No, people of the earth, people cannot yet accept that deep meaning, which you will expose from the depth of the earth.
However, I ask you, love what you excavate and do not curse it, because you do not know how that person had to suffer at one time.
Have respect for what you expose, then the being who lives somewhere cannot and will not be disturbed.
I know how long it will still last, but people will find us, but then the past will not be explained to you.
A thick veil will cover it and namely our love.
One day, when we have received this great happiness, our statues will be found.
However, then we will belong to the beings of light and will have entered the spheres of light.
Then we will be natural and nature will give back this life.
Then the past will be conscious, it will continue to live in reality and carry on to even higher areas, as my master told me.
I can trust this, you and thousands of others can build on it, but know that they are not castles in the air, but a sacred truth, because it is your inner life.
Only there will souls be connected, there man will accept all of this and bow his head and all the questions of ‘for what purpose’ and ‘why’ will dissolve for him.
He will experience them and then his problems and miracles will no longer be problems and miracles.
It will be we ourselves then, it will be your inner and eternal life.
I remained long in thought at the edge of her grave.
I felt a sacred bond within me and there was consciousness within me.
This event gave me the strength to carry on.
Now I would start to work on myself, I wanted to get to know life on earth and on this side.
I looked up into the beautiful face of my master and said: ‘I thank you, my father of centuries ago, I love you.’
‘Now I am leaving, Lantos.’
‘Is it already time?’ I asked.
‘Yes, Lantos, we have to part.
You will follow your own path, but know that I am watching over you and will continue to.
Think of your love, because this love gives you the strength to carry your cross.
Keep all of this deep within you and wait patiently until it is God’s will that you receive this.
Marianne passed over into this life and thought she would see you, but you know that she will go back and only then will you meet her.
That time will come one day!
Try to master that love.
You are searching and you want the good. Continue to search for the good, then I will await you in the spheres of light, in order to continue our work.
Then you will experience miracles again, greater and deeper than you have experienced up until now.
I will prepare myself in the spheres of light in order to be able to receive you.
Know, my boy, that there are many who will wait for you.
When you are once at that stage, I will call you.’
Then I felt his hand on my shoulder and a great light shone about me.
That light gradually moved up before my eyes, it went higher and higher, until I could no longer see it.
Yet I could still hear a voice saying to me from the distance: ‘Farewell, my Lantos, you see, we are going higher and higher.
Farewell, may God bless your paths, your Emschor.’
I was deeply shocked and I collapsed.
I had collapsed on Marianne’s grave and tears flowed down my cheeks.
My love for her was real and deeply human.
As a result of the great love of the man who had just departed that love had grown.
I prayed furiously and for a very long time to God for our love.
My master had departed, now I was alone again, because I would have to miss him for a long time.
My questions of ‘why’ and ‘for what purpose’ had dissolved.
The past had become conscious within me and I had got to know a God of Love.
I now made a decision.
I wanted to get to know all the transitions in spirit, I wanted to know everything, absolutely everything, about this life.
