Does the human skull mean anything to you, Frederik?

Give someone a bunch of flowers, look at him sweetly, act naturally, in a simple way, talk a bit, but watch your words: take life into nature and teach the soul that everything about it is good whatever way it comes to her ...!
One in a thousand, you will bring joy and sunshine into this life.
And it will not cost you anything!
Yet, this is the healing power that can work miracles.
Karel did not believe in it yet; although he had to accept that Erica changed, found herself again.
Then his gait changed, he also became himself again and I saw that the inner wrinkles on his forehead had disappeared.
However, he has lost one certainty; he is looking for his university!
I even believe I can say that he thought he saw that his foundations were terribly moth-eaten.
But he will just have to work it out for himself.
I am waiting, I am on my guard, and I have been warned against hundreds of facts!
Anna is in a seventh heaven: the doctors have gone, Karel now looks at his son himself.
Yet Anna sees him occasionally with a colleague, and I will also get to know him.
Anna knows that it is she who will have to take care of René, and the parents will get the crumbs.
Watch out, that will also be confirmed.
Finally ... my talent as a postman will also be considered necessary for reading the occasional letter.
The months flew past, it no longer rained for Erica, her periods of delirium lessened.
Anna sometimes heard her making frightened noises, but that also stopped, and it was as if her life and personality were actually born again!
She was truly herself and we had apparently almost completed our trip around the world, but I know that we still have to begin it.
Life begins to become dull, it is no longer complicated, what used to be considered as suffering and sorrow, misery is now considered extremely interesting and it is almost a pity that it has gone.
This is the way people are!
I know that we are not out of the woods yet.
We keep seeing them differently ... or have they learnt their lesson?
They are now standing in an empty room, an emptiness arose.
I am now like an old chair so familiar that your back feels and knows every spot, so that you would not miss it for anything.
Sometimes you think of buying a new one, but you cannot bring yourself to make that decision.
Now the friendship is boring ... but it never existed before, it still has to be born.
All that time you saw those masks!
I thought then: this play is getting off to a good start ... there is peace, the tension in the hall cannot remain high, people cannot deal with it, an introduction is needed, a short transitional period to sort out the next problems, because we consider a good overview necessary.
I heard Erica say: “Frederik, what a wonderful trip we had, we saw a lot, I think I can now face up to things.”
This assured me that she has not yet learned anything from all of this.
I left it as she felt it, the way she gave it colour and sunshine, but I have not read everything from her letters, but she is no longer curious about them anymore.
Anna now also sees that René is getting a waterhead.
My God ...
She gave me flowers from her garden; they were not arranged in a bouquet, which Anna is so good at.
She says: “What little children we are, what dope heads.”
She therefore thinks that she has understood everything, but that is not the case; she is back on her own pedestal and does not want to come down!
If only I could read out those other letters!
I am already starting to feel what their contents are, because I saw bears, tigers and snakes, I still remember, and they made her so happy.
I understood then ... that a bouquet of flowers like that really deceives people, I should have come empty-handed; she has still not earned her own bouquet!
Is this so hard to understand, so unnatural?
No, this truth is everywhere, but people have to know where to look!
Whatever the case, René is now one and a half years old and we have started a new life.
Everything went well.
The child requires care, it is Karel who looks at his son; but that was soon no longer necessary either.
However, a few weeks ago there was a change again.
Karel continues to frown because René is so ugly, his head is too big.
It is another matter whether there is anything to this, which Karel does not even talk about.
I know that from Anna.
Who says: “Erica does not want to know, you cannot expect an honest opinion from her either, because she is the mother; however, Karel sometimes stands and looks at that head, shakes his head, and you can clearly feel that it would mean a lot to him to be able to know what is really the matter with his child, his own flesh and blood.
After all, that is only natural.
There is nothing else.
Is Karel looking for symptoms?
He is staring it in the face!
Why is his child’s head too big?
He does not know!
Is it another mean streak by a God who has nothing else to do but tease His children?
Anna says that you can hear him swearing, even if he says nothing.
I think that Karel is suffocating inside; he does not know what to do about this.
I also believe that he will soon think: go to hell ... just keep that vermin yourself!
“I tell you, Frederik ... it will all turn out the way it is meant to, you have to accept everything from nature.
Only remember, you may not desert me.”
Karel is faced with his process, his nature, which regulates everything and takes care of everything, and which human hands should leave well alone.
It is the unknown to him, for his university, his daily work, for which he lives and dies, from which he earns his living.
Now the proof, Karel!
What are you trying to achieve?
Shrugging your shoulders again, laughing at human awkwardness?
You have been given six months, almost a whole year’s time to get back to normal.
Now we are faced with our journey, it will begin, now stoke up the fires, because you will have to earn your living in the sweat of the presence, I say, do not destroy yourself any longer, bow your farmers head, there is more between heaven and earth, which you academics do not yet know anything about.
Just laugh ... walk away from this nonsense ... raise your collar, walk with your doctor’s degree under your arm ... pretend that you know everything.
Can you not see the hidden stick, waiting to give you a good hiding?
Come on, Karel, the boat wants to go forward, stoke, put some more fuel on the fire, you are the engineer for this monster.
We are not yet moving, you are standing thinking; you do not know how to light the fire.
You stand with the shovel in your hands, with coals on it, but you do not know where the furnace door is.
Such worries.
Now He up there can get lost with His beautiful gifts, you do not want this world trip.
Can you hear the false cries from an ordinary crow, Karel?
No, then such tiger-cat, or a jackal, Karel, not to mention the bears and snakes.
However, if you were to meet them, you would collapse, screaming.
Karel is now faced with his own mask and his child’s!
He was just having a rest in his hang mat, but an unnatural force flung him out of it, and he does not know where that disturbance came from.
Is a person not allowed any peace?
Does a person always have to be tortured?
Does He also want that?
What kind of gifts is He giving His people?
I hear him asking questions, in a very weak voice, but he has done it!
The time of preparation has really been profitable for him, as well as for Erica, but the following scene demands their human attention.
Or did those two think, precisely now that it concerns their lives, that they had nothing to do with it?
The curtain goes up of its own accord ... the public wait in excitement, because they feel that this is no longer sensation, it concerns human lives, it deals with knowledge or nonsense, it will go under or overcome it ... we want to know whether God is a Father of Love or ... a cad, a rotter!
This is why there is so much interest.
The play has been going on for thousands of years and only now are people beginning to understand some of it, long ago, a very long time ago it constantly received catcalls.
The writer understood, but thought: I will get back to you soon.
If necessary, I can wait for centuries.
Now we are acting, you listen!
Bowing your heads will follow later!
The masks are gone, but it was replaced by a head that was too big.
René has changed!
I tell you, I do not like the child’s head.
However, as long as everything is going well, I will not give way to pessimism ... I do not intend to find fault with everything, you want people to sleep easy.
Family friends came and went, there are constantly new friends.
Now an academic came to visit, who was already there a while ago, but he suddenly disappeared again without trace.
Anna thinks that the man was away on a trip for his studies.
What I heard about it seems suspicious to me, he is a psychiatrist and is said to be very gifted.
His name is Dr. Groevers.
During those months I worked on my notes, everything is finished, and it looks very neat.
I myself am looking with amazement at the layout and I already know that it will become a book and perhaps more than one book, there is already so much to describe and analyse.
I used to get a good mark for my essays, I think that I have now developed that skill and it is now part of my personality.
This is therefore my second youth.
However, I do not trust René.
I see the child in my own way.
It has sparkling eyes, but most children have that.
However, there is something in his eyes, which I do not like.
It is strange face, if you look at it like that.
It is deformed, if you ask me.
Baby noises are now prevalent, but a question mark remains.
I will continue to be on my guard!
I like human heads.
Did I already tell you that I am extremely interested in the skull?
My observations are usually correct as well, well felt, which assures me that the human head can tell us something about the inner life.
Different worlds speak from the eyes, in my opinion, and are further defined by often very fine lines; the shape of the head is a deciding factor for the personality, you can draw all kinds of conclusions, but there is one line that really tells you everything, which shows you the mask.
You barely have to look at it to know.
Put more clearly, if a life can predict whether it will be a boy or a girl, what can be said about such a large human head?
Would that not be an indication?
Can you not see those strange lines, those colours?
I pay attention to that, it tells me a lot.
I start to feel that we will set up a faculty as a result of this.
I look at human heads and sometimes know immediately how I should consider the contents.
Everyone has that: people look, look into the eyes, follow the lips, all those lines and they think: watch out ... you will fall for it, that is a thief, a rotter, a trouble maker, a charlatan before you.
Therefore, my dear René, just come in, even if you have such a terrible head on your shoulders, you are goodness itself!
I also see that, I feel it, sometimes I know it with one glance.
It is not that strange to pay attention to people’s heads, but they must not know that you are looking at them.
It is dangerous to do that in the street, they would think – those sensitive women – that you were a pervert.
Men do not appreciate what I am doing.
Can you understand that?
It is extremely interesting; you learn such a lot from it!
Karel invited me ... a friend is coming and this friend would like to get to know me.
It is Dr. Groevers.
I am curious as long as all goes well.
We are now sitting round the fireplace; they have introduced me to Karel’s best friend.
Erica is serving us; Karel is talking about a house in the country with horses, which he intends to buy, because he thinks that René will also need something.
However, I can sense his intentions, he is turning the conversation in my direction, and I already know that this friend knows all about me, he has been informed.
Karel has an advantage over me, I am suddenly confronted with his topic of conversation, and he suddenly presents you with it.
I used to always feel awkward, now I am ready, I only long to know how he will manage it.
It will come!
Less than five minutes later he says:
“You see, Hans, that is my hobby.
On the other hand, Frederik is interested in the skull, studies inner phenomena, everyone has his own hobby ...
A horse’s head is even significant to Frederik.”
That was everything.
I thought it was quite cheap, but I will get my own back.
Hans immediately retorts:
“What do we know about the skull, Frederik?
Is it okay if we call each other by first names?”
I have to talk, but I already know whom this Dr. Groevers is.
He has nothing in common with Van Stein or Ten Hove.
He is superior to all those academics as a man and as a personality.
He is a man who is interested in the unknown, because he has taken this upon himself.
He does not laugh at the thoughts of laymen, he knows that he is still a layman himself.
This is how I felt one with him.
Our hearts became one, our personalities touched and we were immediately open to each other ... a lovely feeling flowed into my soul.
We were friends on the spot.
What I felt is strange, I grabbed it with both hands, cherished it, because I had waited for this for so long.
Then I could not help saying:
“Look into the eyes of a horse, Karel ... they are usually asking you if you have anything nice to eat.
If you do not have anything, the first contact will be a failure.
Really and truly, a horse’s head, or any animal’s head, gives itself away!
However, do not forget people.
Just look at all the cattle on earth; it surprises me, between us, that people do not ask you the price of potatoes instead of medicine, because your skull alone shows that you come from the country.
Does it not?”
I thought it was sporting of Karel to say: “Thank you.
Frederik, thanks for that!”
Hans laughs, he enjoys the joke and so does Erica, she laughs, she knows that Karel will not get one over on me again, that is over.
But the game is just beginning.
I continue: “If we want to search for it by means of phenomena, make a safe diagnosis on those grounds, then we will be faced with problems.
Take a look inside a mental institution, where you find a hundred such cases together, then you could immediately start writing an awe-inspiring book, because those heads need ten universities.
In my opinion, you will then be faced with material phenomena that are misshapen through the inner process.
Is nature to blame?
Yes and no; yes as far as the soul – the emotional life, a natural product, and the laws of which we do not yet know – shows us the ‘mask’.
We know how deep that is; thousands of academics gave up their research.
Only a few carry on, but they are mad.”
I am silent for a moment.
Hans looks at me as if he is seeing a miracle.
Karel recoils, he is now faced again with our conversation from a while ago.
He had not given it any more thought, but the facts are still there.
I feel that Hans is not terribly amazed at what was said, he is not that stupid, but he loves the conflict, all the more so because he feels that Karel had not expected it.
I can see that Karel has told him that I am still a child, so awkward, but I am now standing consciously before him and unmask his words as empty talk, show that they have the same value as ... his waffling on about the country house with horses from his dreams for the future.
Hans knows, he is touched by me, and I also feel unity with his life.
“Continue, Frederik”, Hans requests.
I am temporarily dumbfounded, but I beg for fuel, I do not like Karel’s bluffing any longer.
Erica is sitting looking at me as if she sees the East and the West before her, as if she will see revelations in the North and the South, worlds will appear to her small life, she is next to me and now leaves Karel standing in the rain.
Karel notices it, but he cannot do anything about it, it is becoming serious, deadly serious, even if it all seems like nonsense.
I fill Hans’s pipe and ask:
“What do you make of it yourself, Hans?”
I was not yet told that Hans is a psychiatrist.
Anna thought so but if she is right, Hans will now have to play with an open hand.
Look, Hans senses my thoughts and says:
“Frederik, do you know that this is my profession?”
“I thought so, now I know for certain.
Well, what do you think about it?
What do those distorted faces mean to you?
What is your opinion?”
“That is easily said, Frederik, we are powerless, we do not know the actual core, the essence of it, at least I do not, but I try to do something for those people.
It is extremely difficult.”
“We know that.
If you are interested, I will tell you what I think, but do not forget that I am a layman.”
“It does not matter, after all, we are discussing these things.
Do you think that we should consider the skull important?”
“In my opinion, Hans, that points directly to the personality.
We have already discussed it so often.
Karel never accepts it; to him everything is a process and nature.
However, I think that before people are inclined towards the action, which will result in the birth of a child, its soul, or the new life, has already been tuned to the material and human event, in other words: the life, or however you wish to call it, has the capacity of thinking like a human being.
We are now faced with hundreds of thousands of problems, each one of which is concentrated on the personality of this ‘life’, of that child, and they are present as soon as the growth process starts.”
“Are you or were you a theosophist, Frederik?”
“I am not, I follow my own path, but there is something, which points me in this direction, because I have contact with the phenomena.
Let us take another example.
A doctor gets it into his head to question expectant mothers.
He places an advertisement and is sent letters in reply.
There are mothers amongst them who are bothered by facial hair.
However, to Karel this is a process and nature, to the mother it is facial hair and she predicts that she can expect a son.
And it is a son!
Ten Hove and Van Hoogten laughed about it and cleared off.
What to Karel and also to them is nature, became a physical conversation for the mother, body to body, which came to her from inside and influenced her consciousness.”
Karel falls about laughing, Erica looks at me, she understands me and her look says: continue, Frederik, I am beside you, it is a revelation to me, and do not let yourself be beaten by Karel.
Hans threatens:
“If you laugh at Frederik, I will go.”
Now it has been said ...
Karel has to explain himself.
However, he assures:
“I am not laughing at Frederik at all.
I see those two in front of me again, and I also know what they made of it.
Just let me get the laughter out of my system, it will be over soon.
Frederik can understand me, he himself was the cause of it.”
Karel now tells how the doctors were checkmated.
They were simply faced with the facts, which they could not make any sense of, but which forced them to admit that a layman has got the better of them in the presence of a colleague.
He says:
“They are furious at me and will never forgive me.
Am I not allowed to laugh at that?”
“Continue, Frederik.”
Hans remains serious.
“Well, Hans, think about it yourself.
I do not know ... I repeat, but what does it mean for science?”
Hans rubs his forehead.
Karel sees it and laughs to himself; he sees that skull.
Hans is a big man, he has a strong head on those shoulders, his darting eyes are open to the evils of this world, he is as strong as an ox, I think, and a head bigger than Karel and I.
He is shabbily dressed, he wears patent leather shoes under pinstriped trousers, a black coat and his jacket is old.
He has thick eyebrows, a wide nose, firm lips that have something to say, which are never short of an answer.
A personality that demands truth, which fights against poverty, material misery, and it is immediately apparent.
Hans is a man’s man, but I can see, extremely short-tempered.
He can stand his ground, he is unbending, he does not let himself be mocked; he tells you his opinion to your face.
Karel knows that!
Hans says:
“I already said that we do not know.
Today you are faced with a mystery, tomorrow yet another one.
A woman can look at you in such a way that you would like to run away.
There are thousands of other problems that you do not have an answer to.
I stand looking at those heads, Frederik, do what you like with it, but I am powerless, and the rest of this world along with me, you cannot give a helping hand.
I also believe that we have to go in a completely different direction, if we want to bring clarity to this darkness.
Do you think that the baby already starts thinking in the mother’s womb?”
“It is only a theory, Hans, I do not want to force my opinion on anyone as indisputable.
I believe that, that is all there is to it.
In any case, those heads tell me such a lot.”
“Would you like to visit my institution, Frederik?”
“Perhaps later, I do not feel capable of it yet.”
“Come to see me soon, then we will continue our conversation.
I know that the theosophists and other sects can help us, but it is of little use to us.
We are concerned with the beginning, the first phase where life begins.
I am faced with a mystery, Frederik, and I do not believe that we will find a solution to it in the coming century.
Who will help us?
There is plenty of material!
Where does life begin?
I know that the foundations have been laid, but what concerns me, and all my colleagues, and our faculty is the question whether the soul already has a personality in the mother’s womb.
Did you study this?”
“I am thinking about it, Hans.
I follow my own path, but I do not know yet.”
“Tell me a bit about it, about that path you are taking.”
“It is a long story.
Karel would be able to explain it better than I can.
I cannot express myself well, because it cannot be rationalised.
You cannot analyse it, it is not material, and it hangs in the universe.
I will say it all in one word: it is a state of purity, Hans.”
“What is it?” Karel asks.
Hans answers for me:
“What your country house is created from, where all life comes from, sense, feeling, soul and spirit, if I may call it that, where the answer is, the first thought was formed.
It is God!
Is it not, Frederik?”
“Thank you, Hans, thank you, to me it is purity, openness, everything!”
Hans is an academic, but also a man with feelings.
Karel has been standing outside in the rain for some time; he was put outside!
Erica is enjoying herself!
It is as if she is in a heaven.
“You see, Frederik, you accept the most difficult thing there is.
If you have an answer, I would welcome it.
However, make sure that you remain a child; otherwise, you will break your neck.
I also did a study, but I had to stop because it was destroying me.
My nature cannot cope with it”, Hans remarks.
“You are too short-tempered!”
“Thank you, Frederik, I have to admit that.
I have to have something to occupy myself, but although I thought that we could help those mad people, I am powerless.
I would like to dissect them to see what is inside; you know the feeling.
However, I do not know anything.
Their brains no longer mean anything to me, and if the life leaves the body, you are faced with another mystery.”
“Masks, Hans, all masks.”
“A wonderful well chosen word, Frederik, you know how to express yourself.
What a pity, we need you.
Why did you not follow this study?”
“To have to accept that feeling of powerlessness just like you?”
“Do you think that you will work it out?”
“The phenomena take us to the very beginning, Hans, the beginning leads through the end to the answer.”
“Do you wish to find that out under your own power, Frederik?”
“I have help, Hans, I see it lying in the street gutters.”
“How rich you are.
I am grateful for the opportunity of having met you.
I am happy today and I think that I will sleep well.”
Karel looks at me and thinks that he is seeing a ghost.
Hans notices it and says:
“You see, Karel, that is something which you did not think of.
To me Frederik has something like a sixth sense.”
“Never that, Hans.”
“I know that you do not wish any gifts.
You want to deal with everything inwardly.
I heard that you had seen a lot of the world and I also know a bit about the laws of the East.
There is something in me, which connects me to that world.
I tell you, be careful, you could lose yourself as a result.
If only we could see behind those masks, Frederik.”
“I am working on it, Hans.
I see behind many masks, they all say: be careful ... a death is laughing, plays with violets before you arrive and behaves like an unborn child, feels ... sighs, is wind, is love, a process?
You can hear organ music, you feel as if you are being carried, you are kissed, people are nice to you, you feel that kiss, but it is a strange love!
Did you think, Hans, that your mad people did not know the answer?
Only you cannot see behind those masks, you do not know yet where you should start, you stand before them as a person, but that is not the way; you must not want to be a person.
I think in the ‘nothingness’: it lives in the depth of your bosom; it also beats, just like during the day.
It is right under your nose, you hear it screaming, but at that moment, you are stone deaf, even harder than steel, because we have converted the natural origin into a trotting race.
Good gracious, how difficult it is becoming!
Only when you are ready will you hear a language of which you will have no idea of its origin.”
“You are my man, Frederik!
Why do you not write a book about this?
You can give things a name, pronounce them, while we cannot find the words, it lives in your heart.
You can give shape to things and now everything takes shape.
Do you know that?”
“I already said that”, Erica remarks, “he has a born talent.”
“Really, Frederik, Erica is right, you must put these thoughts in writing.
It would be a pity if you did not, and you have the time for it.
“So you agree with me, Hans, that you cannot look behind the masks?”
“I am busy trying it out.
I do not know yet whether I will be successful, but I can see in a different way, I am different.
Karel asked what had happened to me.
Erica has known for a long time that I can see so many things just lying in the street gutters.”
“What can you see, Frederik?”
“Masks, Hans.
Only masks.
They are so different, but they are masks ...
And yet I hope to make a university of it.”
Karel is not laughing.
Erica is sweet.
Hans is thinking.
He appears excited, he is so tempestuous, so quick, and he suffers from his powerlessness.
“Masks”, he mumbles, “masks, yes, they are masks; they are all masks.
Everything in this world wears a mask; all of us are masks.
All things wear a mask.
There is nothing in this world that does not wear a mask ...
Damn ... how poor we are and how difficult it is becoming!
Another silence falls.
We really have nothing more to say.
The human heads remained undisturbed, because we do not understand them in the least, Hans is suffocating inside, Karel is like a beaten dog, and Erica looks as if she wishes to say, can you see it now?
You laughed, you laughed at my mask and at René’s mask, now you are faced with it yourself with your country bumpkin’s head, Karel, dearest.
It is finally Hans who breaks the silence.
“You must come and see me as soon as possible, Frederik, I want to talk to you”, he says.
Erica pours a drink; we light a cigarette, but remain silent.
A moment later Hans says to Karel:
“If you ever consider getting rid of this old piece of furniture; you know, it is my hobby and I will take it off your hands immediately.”
That was spot-on ...!
How awful for Karel.
He almost falls down, what a pity that his armchair prevents his fall.
However, Erica caresses his hair ...
“Everything is okay”, she says, “you may come in now.”
She is still talking from the universe and Karel asks in astonishment:
“Come in?”
“You were outside in the rain, remember”, Hans explains.
Feelings reach unity, they cannot be stopped, and they penetrate everything, also human skulls.
However, Karel is a sport.
He bows his head again and we laugh.
Now we can laugh, because everything is okay, a mask just fell!
Did you see that?
Did you really see that?
I did as well!
Yet, Hans still would not believe it, but still?
Hans still wants to give all of himself, and he wants to get to the bottom of it, he cannot be satisfied.
I make it clear to him:
“In the first place, Hans, you have to look at your people in a different light.
If you see them as people, then you are looking at them from the normal point of view.
You must try to understand that in their abnormal ways they are ... normal!
I am telling you, although I do not know it yet, everything is normal.
Even the existence of good and evil alongside each other!
Of course, it is another matter whether God approves of this, but their existence, their presence and therefore their process is normal!
It is normal that we are to blame for our own misfortune, that one life is blessed and another is cursed, as well as thousands of other matters that demand justice.
I know just as little as you do how to explain everything, because the truth, the answer lives behind all of this.
I am searching for it.
You and Karel are doing something about it.
Erica experienced it herself.
I saw that hallucinations can be artistic.
I saw that life, the process, started to long for a drink, and was able to drink a pitcher of Dutch gin before nine o’clock in the morning when it had acquired a taste for it.”
Karel takes me away from my story; he has to laugh.
Hans is furious.
I have been interrupted, but I just continue, I now know that Erica can take a tumble, she begs me, as it were, to continue.
“Are you still trying to maintain, Hans, that life itself cannot think like we can?
The life in the mother’s womb possesses an independence!
And that independence can feel the urge for a drink.”
“Do you believe in reincarnation, Frederik?”
“I do not know.
I do not know enough about that subject.
I have my reservations about everything which I do not know.”
“You are a born analyst, did you know that?”
“It is possible, but I will not get involved in theosophy.
It is possible that these teachings are the right ones, I do not believe in the existence of spiritualism either, at least not in the authenticity of the phenomena!
I have to be able to see and feel everything.
In any case, it has not brought wisdom to earth.
What do we know about parapsychological phenomena?
I have visited the East ...
They say there, listen carefully, you Westerner ... be careful, it will cost you your life.
However, I continued to search.
I have now adjusted to that life, I am following my own path, I deliver letters, I sweep the streets and I am the postman of this state of purity!”
“Do you have any post for me, Frederik?”
“I will not forget, Hans.
However, do not forget that I am only a poor man, an awkward child, compared to you, being an academic.
However, behind the mask another personality is waiting for you.
It is up to us to learn the language, which it speaks.
I do not believe that you need any French, German or English for it.”
We end the evening.
I shall see Hans again.
I look forward to seeing him more often.
The playhouse is now deserted, the actors are now behind the scenes, but noise can be heard, the next act will soon begin.
There is new excitement in the hall.
It is really interesting, and everyone feels deadly seriousness.
However, I go back home and soon fall asleep.
I had wonderful dreams like never before.
It is something completely new to me.
I give in to it completely, if I can, because at the end of the day we received everything!
We are still one with the universe in which we live.
As long as everything turns out okay!
I try to be very careful.
We will wait and see.
However, I believe that the masks will attack me.
Then what, Frederik?
We shall see, help will probably appear, even glow worms ... I believe ... got to see biblical justice.
Or am I now wrong?
Someone once told me about a miracle and glow worms were involved.
Did the man think that he was affected?
I do not know!
You would say so!
Then he continued on his way!
My heart is calm!
One thing ... I know, if people are laughing behind my back, I will not turn back ... I know that mask!
Can you feel that soft blow coming towards you?
You think that you will receive flowers.
When you try to take them, it appears that they are not meant for you.
Again, you hear laughter ...
Do not pay any attention to it!
Good grief, such emptiness.
Believe me, I am at peace!