Do you think fools have supernatural powers, Frederik?
If a person is talking about himself, if you hear him mentioning supernatural things and he behaves as if he has ‘heaven and earth’ at his feet, then you feel like saying: Completely mad ... he has lost his marbles, it is the talk of a dreamer.
Gone is the human being, that personality will be destroyed, sullied, slandered, because people do not understand that person and think it is unnatural, because that does not exist!
That is not possible, such people do not live in this world.
Is a sensible person not right?
I know when it concerns sacred matters; even a psychopath who is rebelling comes and thinks that he can see behind your mask.
It is the worst battle that people like us can fight; it has always been like that, since the origin of man.
Everyone wants to represent the ‘absolute’, defend their own God, whether they know Him or not.
If you touch upon the word of God, even if you are faced with a consciousness like a pig, an intuition like a rabbit, an emotional life like a duck, a mentality like a herd animal, I swear to you, if you start talking about God and His laws, about faith and love, justice and creation, then you will suddenly be faced with a battle of life and death and there will be victims.
A moment later you will see that you were faced with a religious maniac and you will understand that you have wasted all your strength, and that it was not worthwhile.
You will then be faced with the facts.
Such a praying soul was cheated by Him, this abuser hit this child so it was as blind as a bat and then you feel sorry for all those people who think that they have to do something for their Creator on their own, because everyone does so and wants to live and die for His Father.
Of course, I am not talking about the type that does not look at Him and just lives without a care.
This is what I thought when I was cheated yesterday.
However, let us not get too far ahead of things.
So I saw the sign of the cross ... during an unnatural sleep, a sleep that makes you aware, in which you can see and think.
You know what I mean.
I first wondered who was showing me this sacred thing?
I am quite sure that the sign of the cross has always existed, even before Christ came to earth.
I assume that this sign only belongs to Him and it is therefore obviously considered as supernatural, if it is perceived by the human eye.
Although I did not ask for it, it came to me, but a moment later I had to accept that I had been sold a pig in a poke again and a deformed one at that.
I should have got a shock, but I split my sides laughing, because what did I see, what did I experience?
I was lying on my back, my arms by my sides, I find this position the most restful. I had fallen asleep and started to dream.
Suddenly, it actually approached me carefully - because it had to be built up beforehand - I saw the sign of the cross.
A moment later, I got a shock and I was wide awake.
Then I burst out laughing, but started to think. I now actually saw the whole world passing me by, I saw thousands of people who, like I, had sought the God of all life and had lost themselves as a result.
The end for these souls was built up before me.
However, then I saw Hans and around him all his mentally handicapped patients, all his fools.
The first thing I thought then was: let me see whether I am amongst them or not, but I did not find myself.
Now see the sign ...
I look at the window.
A beam of light falls through the window, about fifty centimetres below lies a copper rod, which holds up the curtains.
The curtains are torn apart there, which is something which I cannot understand, but which brought about the miracle in the street for me.
That was now the sign of the cross.
Through a street lamp!
I was suddenly standing with both feet firmly on the ground and then understood the danger I was in.
I lay down again to rest and to reflect.
I immediately thought of Hans.
I heard him say: watch out, Frederik, do not lose yourself; what you are doing is perilous.
That is the way it is!
However, now to the working of that street lamp.
It was that chink, through which the light shone on me and fell exactly on my eyes.
I lie there facing it.
Slowly the daylight works upon me and I take it over in my sleep.
I see it before me, well, I see a moment later that medals are being pinned to my chest.
I said: ‘Thank You!’
Proof that I accepted everything and was tuned into it, that it was doing me good.
I combined it immediately with delivering messages, which was a part of my postman’s nature, and thought: good, I will carry on tomorrow.
Immediately afterwards it was the bare facts and bowing to the truth.
I now wondered: just imagine that I was a Catholic, made my confession, and still climbed the altar to receive Divine grace; I firmly believe that I would have declared myself a saint.
I will say nothing about my Catholics, spare me, not a hair on my head would think of saying anything horrible about them.
My opinion is that we are all children of one Father and that we are all right.
However, one thing repels me: I no longer believe that God will damn His children.
However, you will sense where I am leading and what is significant for us.
Take a spiritualist.
I assure you, that the same man, or woman, will already have told everyone the next day that Christ had appeared before him and had said: “Can you see Me?
Go forth and do My work.”
There goes that life then, head over heals, through the streets of the town, with the cross on his chest, carrying incense, with tears in his eyes, weeping day and night from all these sacred things, until the end comes: Hans’ institution. Or the whole of this long life sitting before and behind this little cross, loneliness, and a white sheet, being declared a saint; but to many completely insane!
It is true, is it not?
Now we are faced with a Catholic, with his minister or bishop looking at him and talking sensibly to him.
He is given a word of warning, paternal advice: now careful, do not spoil anything.
I know this from experience and I can swear to it.
I already experienced something like that before.
I mean to say by this that a Catholic like that has more to hold onto than the spiritualist who has bolted does.
A theosophist does not do that, cannot do that.
He is different and more advanced; even if he has adorned himself with frills the past few years, just like the other sects.
I saw all those people running, I looked at them, followed all their movements and thought: watch out, Frederik, or you will also end up in prison as a fraud!
That would cost me my head!
I took all of this to heart as a warning, which did not cost me anything, because I got it from a simple street lamp.
I was therefore rapped on my fingers by a coincidence.
I was very grateful for it and immediately felt the incredible danger to myself and others who had accepted me as a friend.
I reflected for a long time and without pardon to myself, and made progress.
I consider it as the preparation, the completion for those other masks, amidst which Hans lives and works.
I said to myself: you do not need to possess any imagination; hallucinations will take you to an abyss.
Now my adornments were gone.
However, I now had to accept that in reality I longed for them.
I stood naked, and that was necessary, because there were feelings within me that were open to vanity and enjoyed seeing themselves look nice.
Those thoughts or feelings came straight from my world of desires, they took over my conscious ego and look: Frederik was walking under a mask, he stuck out his elbows, and there was no one who could walk through.
It was I, with my stupid and awkward ego, who had perceived that ‘little cross’ and experienced its sacredness.
That within myself did not ask: how did I earn that?
It swallowed that sacredness and I therefore placed myself on a pedestal!
Thank God, I was thrown off immediately, otherwise all of my learning, my searching for the truth would have received a blow at that moment, which could never have been put right again, I had laboured upon it and later had to accept that the unnatural moth had eaten away at the whole affair.
I was right on top of it and did not even see it.
Do you now understand that I have started to like street lamps?
One of them brought about a change in my way of thinking and searching.
If my soul had not been so sensitive, then this evening light would not have been able to make my inner eyes flicker, but that is what happened.
That light continued to shine on me, even penetrated my sleep and there you are: the sign of the cross comes to me in my sleep.
That streetlight was stronger than I was, it overwhelmed me; it allowed me to see and made me happy.
However, now for the mystery of this everyday event.
Can you feel that we, when we are released as people from our own ego, have lost ourselves, can experience other things, which are then given to your life just like that?
Now you can understand that I, who was losing myself, am open to other thoughts.
If I had still been myself, there would no longer be a question of ‘receiving’.
I would not be open to it then.
In this way I therefore get sent all my thoughts, I get to see images, which you could probably call visions, but which to me are the voice that possesses a state of purity and the absolute, which show people like us the supernatural, as a result of which humanity will finally awaken.
Hans called that inspiration. Erica also, and because of it she played as never before; I thought then for a moment that Franz Liszt had made her possessed, as if he himself had sat down at the keyboard, but later I completely disregarded that idea, namely when the bestial side was revealed to my life
I called it the voice for the absolute, for the state of purity.
It is so pure as can be, but you have to be open to it and remain completely aware, as natural as possible, otherwise, you will create the hallucination yourself, you will be dealing with your own fantasy, which will later behead you, make you break your neck!
However, if you can lose yourself, and wish to trust in a better and higher ego, believe me – you have already seen and been able to follow it – then you will receive truth, then you will not die, but then there will have to be nothing more in you which is open to noise, vanity, therefore pride, spiritual conceit, otherwise, you will break yourself sooner or later!
You stumble and you go straight to religious mania, you will go mad!
I was now warned against that.
I wept like a happy child.
To prove that I am happy I will send 1000 guilders today to an institution, which provides the poor with something better, gives food and drink to the needy, for which I sometimes give a small contribution.
I was so grateful, and still am, as a result of my street light in front of my house, it received a personality which a person does not have, because an innate piece of iron like that does not think as people like us do.
In order not to fall to the level of the abnormal, I do nothing, but I would like to give that thing a name and put a decoration around it, give it a medal which I had thought I would like for myself.
I shall be nice, I shall say good day to the thing every day, show my gratitude in this way, accept all of it as a friend, because this event beat a great hole in my soul.
All the same, what a fright I got!
Then I thought of all the people who went on the run for me to pull this rotten humanity out of the mud.
I thought of all those people who received their sainthoods and sold them for divine matters or divided them out just like that, as a result of which they were even holier, but a holiness that means nothing to me, because life on earth makes demands.
Someone sees ‘Maria’ and her image is awe-inspiring, wonderful!
If it is true, I have sacred respect for it, but I now wonder: did that woman not just see the light of the street lamp through a crack?
Was a street lamp not involved in her apparition?
Was it all pure divine light?
Was there nothing there belonging to herself?
You see, it made me reflect deeply.
When I had a conversation in thought with that person, I was faced with a fool.
I saw a religious maniac; the child died from this holiness.
This completely normal soul dissolved completely ... in muck, in mud, which not a single sensible person wants anything to do with, because it stinks there!
To me this was a raised hand with ‘two fingers’.
Be careful, Frederik!
If you do not wish to be cheated, accept it then!
Keep your normal thoughts under the divine pump, so that He can freshen you up when He wants to!
Now you have to look at that source, that water of life, and at the man who pretends to be God, because I do not believe that He occupies himself with such matters.
I then saw a mask, a devilish prank, Satan, who wanted to freshen me up, and then pour his muddy bath over me.
For the beginning is always good, the end is nonsense, the complete lack of human thinking and feeling, gibberish!
I concluded that I was still open to that spiritual adulation, that medal chasing, that Divine coat.
So many systems have already been elevated.
Hundreds of prophets came to give people gifts from their Father.
Later, it appeared that they had not only run off with the cash-box, but they themselves had also absolutely not understood their loose talk, which they had sold off as supernatural wisdom.
There were also some who were made out to be cheats, and others went to the mental institution.
None of them had seen their chinks properly, but they had accepted them and put them in their flower gardens as divine miracles.
Can you see their university?
Laugh at their foolish carry-on, but do not forget that this destroyed thousands of people.
I am now telling you that I am no spiritual runner, no liar.
I do not imagine that I am an extraordinary person; I am too sensible for that.
However, I swear to you that I am open to true things and would devote my life to them.
I am not a man who puts a crown on his head, I kick pedestals away from under my feet.
I do not like decorations, I do not want those things, but I thirst for knowledge!
I am not a man to accept charity, I would rather work, and I want to earn my keep honestly.
I saw all those others as a result of this.
I saw them in a white sheet standing before me.
I am disgusted at those followers who consider their master as a saint, and who want to watch over his personality because this world is too harsh for their master ...
I would rather stand in this rotten society and participate in it.
I want to learn and behave normally.
If such a saint lies down in his little shed and from there spreads his wisdom throughout the world, I do not call that art, but fear, futility, because I can see that these people do not know the difficult life in the town.
It is easy for them to talk ...
You have to do it like this and you have to do it differently, they themselves are out of all the danger and behave like saints!
I tell you again: I am disgusted at these holy people as soon as I compare them to Him.
Now everything falls!
He walked barefoot through wind and rain.
He did not need a cigarette ...
I do, I like my cigar, but I do not have any other air and graces anymore, I am as naked as a freshly plucked chicken.
I saw through all these great people and then found that they first had to go to Jerusalem to find out whether the cock would perhaps crow for them.
I already heard it ... and how it crowed ...!
I saw them going and I knew: there they go, one for one they break their precious necks!
Do you not know them?
I understand, Hans would kill me if he would soon have to accept that I was a fool like that who treated his life with such nonchalance.
I am not the type to deceive a person.
This is why I thank everyone for my blow; I have now been warned for thousands of them.
I would rather break my neck myself before I would get another person into it.
I would rather die a violent death, than talk nonsense!
I will not act too hastily!
I immediately cut the unhealthy parts out of my heart, and I give myself a good beating, because I have learned that you cannot avoid it anyway.
Sooner or later you will be faced with your own destruction and then you will have to accept that, with the sad consequence that you possess neither a way to go forward nor backward.
I love people and all life too much.
I will not do any stupid things consciously; I am only a simple postman.
You already saw it: you can also break your neck with that.
I do not intend to help people towards damnation with my searching and talking; I am not the type.
My Stetson is at ‘half past six’ and it will remain so, no one must be able to see when looking at me that the supernatural touched me and opened my doors wide.
I do not want anything to do with spiritual noise, or have anything to do with heights; I put a stop to human adoration.
However, you cannot help wondering, what is that chap getting at; can you?
Well, I discussed all of this with myself and now consider it as the preparation for later, for Hans and his lunatics, but especially for later.
Can you not feel then that we are busy losing our own legs?
That is already possible because of a little cross like that, drawn on a window by a street lamp, and then the reality.
I cannot bear thinking about it, but I am whole lot further!
If you fall it is not the way you fall from a horse, but one from which you cannot recover in a thousand years.
You make an incredible tumble, which no misery of this world can be compared to, even if you are infected by leprosy!
It is that bad!
Yet, these supernatural powers and forces are treated so nonchalantly.
I know one thing: it is your fall or your resurrection!
That is true, but just lose yourself!
I continued to follow all those images the whole day.
I remained alone, did not want to see anyone, because I thought this was necessary for myself and did not want to be disturbed in anything.
In the woods, I suddenly knew it.
I felt released from all those people, immediately saw where the good and bad in us was busy carrying out undermining work and as a result of this I got to see my own personality.
I saw where the mistakes lived in myself, even if they wanted to put on their masks, I lifted them up and then they got a severe beating.
One by one, they were put across the knee, ignoring their screaming and their pain.
I think that I then understood that ‘Franciscus’; however, I did it differently because I saw that my castle had nothing to do with it.
However, he spoiled the good source, deformed the beautiful body in which he lived and created mortal destruction!
I do not know whether he became spiritually wiser from it, I did not speak to him.
However, it is possible!
A few days later, I was standing before Hans, ready and aware, but like a child.
The academic took me to his institution.
There were a hundred people gathered together, men and women.
I am missing something, I thought, I do not see any children.
Then I asked Hans why there were no children, he looked at me in surprise and did not give me an answer.
A few seconds later he almost attacked me and screamed:
“My God, Frederik, it all looks so ordinary, you just asked me something, which I had never really thought about.
I remember that I used to think about it sometimes.
Now that you ask me that question, it is as if I feel a blow to my head, I am so shocked by it.
Why are children not mad?”
“I know how you feel, Hans, but you are mistaken.
I can see and feel it differently.
Have you forgotten about those little psychopaths then?
All your backward little children?”
“That is true, but what is it then?”
“I thought of children now that I see all those adults.
However, there is a gap between adulthood and the childlike emotional life.
You do not see a fool of the same type as these adults amongst children.”
Now I was right in the middle of it and under it as well.
Hans explained all those conditions to me.
I looked at all those people, and I absorbed it completely.
Every being there meant something to me.
I saw and felt every condition differently, just like Hans, but for me a supernatural world was opened.
When I was filled to the brim, I suddenly burst out:
“How supernatural this is!”
“Do you think fools are supernatural, Frederik?”
These people are incredible; they are supernatural.
We as conscious people are deaf and dumb, are masks, these people cannot wear any masks, they are naked for me, even if I do not yet know how their misery came about.”
“I cannot understand you now, Frederik.”
“I thought so, I was talking about the supernatural and immediately afterwards about the misery which exists, of course.
However, everything is so different, Hans.
So incredibly real and wonderful at the same time, that my head is already bursting from tension.
I believe that all the locks are open and I have to know.”
“Will you tell me all about it, Frederik?”
“I will not forget anything, my friend, you may know all about it.”
“Here”, Hans says, “the women.
One has different feelings to the other, but all of them are mad: one because she has murdered her child, another because she lost her child.
That woman there because her man deceived her, this woman as a result of her first love.
Mad, mad, mad!!!
That is all.
If I had not been so strong, I would also become mad.
However, I will not go into that too deeply, that is not the intention either.
One woman came to grief because of religion, she prays day and night to her Lord; that woman there curses Him and has gone mad because of it.
There is a mother who went mad because of her whoring, that woman there because she lost her money.
I see all of them, know how they came to grief, but I do not understand a single thing about it, Frederik, if I tell the truth.
I do not understand them, or in your own words, I do not know these souls, I believe I will suffocate in it yet!
What do sexual inclinations mean to me?
They mean nothing any more.
What do the feelings of a mother who has murdered her child, therefore her remorse, mean to me, not a jot!
What I can do, Frederik, is to serve, no more than that!
However, I want to become wiser from it.
I am standing still!
I am working myself to the bone.
Look properly, I will tell you all about it: you tell me what you think about it, open the doors of your knowledge for me, Frederik, feel how urgently necessary it is that we know.”
I saw a hopeless mess.
Poverty and misery: I was in a madhouse.
While we walked round, I was also dressed in one of Hans’ white coats, and I absorbed everything.
I thought that I looked green and yellow, my heart thumped in my throat, then again I felt myself becoming red and blood hit my jaws, a moment later Hans saw me as white as a corpse, ready to be buried.
However, he continued to talk, I listened and meanwhile built up my faith, my hope and my love for these children.
The weak personality lives there.
I felt that all these illnesses come from the personality.
I see René amongst these patients.
From the child I come to these women, soon to the men.
I cannot see any mortal destruction, at least not what I expected.
I can see beautiful bodies embodied by lunatics.
What a scab you are, oh God, if you have all of this on your conscience.
However, I do not believe it, you do not have this on your conscience, impossible, forgive me for daring to imagine this.
There are one or two people amongst them of whom you would say: she has perished through mortal destruction.
That woman there is a bit twisted, there again I see a beauty, even if these women are very old, the castle looks fine.
It is their human eyes!
You see everything there and you can read what it is like inside.
Those eyes hold my attention.
I follow their gazes; I beg them to leave my body alone.
Something happened ...!
One woman has bolted and does a streak.
Hans laughs and pokes me in the ribs, so that I tumble upside down ...
Hans catches me and says:
“You must see that as a little extra, Frederik, the castles open and close here, it is an everyday thing, we get used to everything.
However, is this the soul, Frederik?
Is this the personality alone?
That woman there has a tumour.
We cannot do anything about it; we know beforehand that she would succumb under the knife.
What can you do then?
Should we consciously murder this soul?
I do not consider it and the family feels the same way as I do and the others.
However, everything is rotten!
We are faced with a space.
We are faced with working ourselves to the bone, we feel completely deceived, Frederik ... a part of you, but we are faced with the problem.
I wish I had never started it!
Is this the soul, I ask you?
What do you know about the soul and the personality?
Everything, which you now see is weakening of the spirit; they are the weak people from our society.
After all, if all these people, personalities, had possessed a bit more strength, they would not be here.
Now we are faced with the question: ‘Does God want all of this?
Is it His fault?
Does He beat His people?
Did He give me the brains to help them and did He beat these souls with fire?
It is devils work, if you ask me.
They are songs of Satan, which you hear here, everything is misery, deception, decline!
Just go with me, back to the men.
But tell me in the meantime what your impressions are.”
“I cannot utter a word so I will wait for just now.
Like you, I am faced with the soul, its infinite world and its poverty.”
“Do you call this infinite, Frederik?
It is miserable, there is nothing else left, and this is the naked truth.
You would prefer to beat them, but you know that they cannot help it.
What are those women and all these men doing here on earth?
Why were they sent to this world?
Why do they deliver this type, when we have to accept anyway, Frederik, that there are better types?
What do these holy angels want?
What does God want with this type, I ask you?
They have saddled us up with the most rotten kind, we just have to try to make people out of them and that is not possible.
These are my questions if you wish to know.
Then this as well:
Does God wish to destroy His humanity?
Did He thrash this out of His earth?
Must we bring peace and quiet to earth with this?
I know, Frederik, that I am making a fool of myself as a doctor, but as a person I think of it as you do ... we have been deceived!
I assume that there are all types of people on this earth, but it is a mystery to me why the earth was given such a task to fulfil.
Now the above.
What is life like on other planets?
It does not mean a jot to me.
Let us first be sure that we ourselves come into harmony with reality.
What happens above us, next to us then if you prefer that, does not concern me, those types of colleagues are just as powerless as we are.
It is searching in space, working ourselves to the bone, and all of us long for knowledge.
The list is endless.
Not one person knows the space, knows the laws for himself, all of them are powerless.
What are you, what do you want, what would you like?
Just look at all these men now, Frederik.
Do you see those sinister faces?
Do you see that human longing, the asking for some flesh?
Not all of them are bothered by it, but precisely those who do not have it are even more awful to us, because in their case you do not see any symptoms, in their case, you are faced with a true mask.
Should I be grateful to God for life?
Should they send that up to Him from their sick self?
Frederik, all these people have known birth, they went the same way as we did, but they went mad!
Did they come to this earth for this purpose?
Must God make such a fuss about it?
Is the birth of a person something so supernatural?
Do you still see these people as supernatural creatures?
I believe, Frederik, that I will then grab you by your coat and throw you out of the door, because then I can no longer believe in you.
These people are sick with misery.
Should God talk of love?
Does He wish us to accept Him in love?”
“Stop it, Hans, or I will go ... you are talking as if you are possessed.”
“That is what you thought, Frederik, but I am not.
I am possessed by inhuman suffering; I am going into it too deeply.
I nearly lay amongst these fools, I already collapsed, but I picked myself up and also put my legs under my body again.
Now that you are here, I am succumbing again.
You are right, my dear friend, it was me who warned you, but I forgot myself.
Yet, if I wish to ask all these questions, remember them, because we have to talk about it.
See, Frederik, how miserable it is here.
All these people are stinking through their own decay.
There is nothing in this world that can be compared with this life.
You can be blind, deaf and dumb, have arms or legs missing, this is the worst thing there is, and these souls are nothing more!
They are rotting and bad!
There are some people to whom we give extra treatment, sometimes they get their own battle which we know what to do about, but in which we see no change.
It is the same carry-on day in day out.
Just try that, just give this, deny him his freedom for a week, inject him, treat him with a bit more tact, put your own emotional life on hold, give some love.
Did you think, Frederik, that I had become a doctor, a psychiatrist, for this misery and quackery?
Look at that man there ...
Today he feels like a farmhand, tomorrow the gentleman will be Napoleon and an hour later a general.
This office clerk came here as a result of arrogance, he is not dangerous, but what do you wish me to do?
Just talk, eyes look at you, I understand you, Frederik, and I can now see a mask!
However, behind it?
Or in it?
Who started the fire?
Did the soul do that itself?
Did it want to act the general and brag because it earned just enough in that office to stay alive?
Was that soul sent to this world for this purpose?
I tell you, as long as I have been here, I have asked the same questions over and over again every day.
Now I thought that He was a ‘scab’!
What do all these other illnesses mean, Frederik, if you have to accept that the soul becomes covered in mud?
Just look around this world.
You would really long to have no consciousness.
You would want to live with the Eskimos, in the jungle; because there are not so many fools living there, and only our society has them.
Is God playing with all of us?
Or is it the soul itself that is to blame for its decay, its loss of powers of thought?
I do not know!
I am powerless and our faculty along with me!”
A moment later, Hans continues:
“They are all stupid, Frederik.
You will not find even one who has common sense.
How we fiddled about with those human brains.
Is that material of any significance to the soul? I do not think so.
I think that this clockwork is made up differently, we do not yet know it, Frederik, and we are searching.
Now look at old and young, absorb it completely.
It is insignificant to us whether they die today or tomorrow.
We give our hearty congratulations to anyone who goes at a young age.
We will then enclose a letter for Him, which is Love.
We will ask Him whether He would not like to stop; this provocation is no longer human.
However, He leaves us to fend for ourselves, lets us find it out for ourselves!
However, we, Frederik, are men of science, we are no longer tramps, you have to look into our hearts.
Now you can see a history of suffering, our destruction.
Any of us who have faith, go to church, have a different opinion, of course, but to our profession they are herd animals, fundamentally they are insignificant, a genius has never yet been born from that clique.
They are not people, Frederik, they are the poor of spirit in this science.
They do their best, but they are no more than a male nurse.
They give their medicine as they were taught, but they are no more use to you than that.
However, I am not like that!
I will be damned if I will stand about empty handed, Frederik, I devote my life to this.
I want to help these people with my own blood if I knew that I would achieve something with it.
Then, Frederik, the knowledge!
If we have to continue like this, we will never make it.
I ask you - and I ask everyone that - if you think that you can see behind these masks, then do it for me!
Do it for these souls, do it for God as well, then that shouting from my soul will stop, and from them who already had to accept their own destruction for me.
Because we will all be destroyed by it!
Look, Frederik, these are my men ...!
Good day, Henkie?
Did you see that little face?
Still a child, Frederik.
This is a child in an old castle.
Seventy-four years old, but like a child of four years at the most and not the most misfortunate.
Now the overgrown boys.
You now come in my heart’s blood, Frederik, because I am no longer a person there.
I therefore flatly refuse to make a child ...
He can sort out that mess Himself for me, I do not wish for His great gifts.
The fifty patients whom I have here have all been crushed to death.
See for yourself, Frederik ...
Tomorrow some will leave; they have been certified incurable ...
The heart breaks, your personality seems; all your own words, but it is true!
Did you really think, Frederik, that you could impress us academics with your layman’s talk?
That we would rely on your research, that we expect higher help?
Did you really think that I am capable of placing my human feeling next to that of the academic and now dance in a circle around these two that have nothing in common with each other?
Do not get a shock, my dear Frederik!
I did not let you talk, I did not cheat you ...
But did you not feel my pains?
I listened with my full attention, with love for your soul, but, I now ask you, do you understand how terrible it is if you as a layman garble about supernatural things?
I am confronting you with the facts, Frederik.
I know that I can count on your pure friendship, but I ask you to watch out!
If I soon have to accept that you are denying me the only thing to hold onto through your awkwardness, your sick talk, your human over-sensitivity, you will die!
Then you do not know me yet, Frederik, because all these matters are too serious!
I do not tolerate quackery, nor do any of us.
We will break you, as long as you know that!
We will break you, all of us, who like me devote our lives to our work ...!
Frederik, we will inject you with poison as a result of which you will know what they experience, what they go through, because you are making fun of all this misery.
You can sense me, Frederik, it is deadly serious to me.
In the name of the people here, in the name of my faculty, I am telling you now, amidst these patients: watch out for yourself, do not do anything stupid, or come with talk that you cannot support, or I will kill you instantly!
I already feel that you understand me, because you are quiet, you know me.
I am a terrible man, Frederik, others along with me, but we do not let these patients come to grief, we do not finish them off with layman’s gibberish ...!
We devote our own lives to them.
It will be clear to you what this means, if you know how miserable our existence is!
May providence give you the word!
However, for me, it is the knife to cut out all this misery.
I hope, Frederik, that I will have to take back all my words, even if I love a Father of love!
Is it clear to you?”
Hans looks at me for a moment and then decides:
“Do not think, Frederik, that we will wait for you.
Do not think either that your ‘university’ does not mean anything to me.
We have to rely on people who are able to propose new axioms separate from us.
You see, we are really following one path, we are experiencing one life, I am no more than you, you see more than we are, but you give colour to the lines, you inspire sense, because you, as I already know, possess the contact!
I am building on you, not only as a person, but also as a doctor!”
We look at his boys.
I am not shocked by his words, I am so grateful. The things I experience.
I believe that Hans would have killed me if I had not thought about all those words for myself.
I was therefore ready and no more.
However, how can it be?
I understood him completely.
I did not expect any different.
This is Hans.
There are few like him!
We go to his room.
We talk a bit more, agree to continue in a few days time, decide what day and what time ... then I was standing outside.
It is late afternoon ... nice weather for the time of year ... I walk and carry on walking.
I come home late in the evening, deep in thought.
Will I be able to sleep normally?
Oh, that poor Hans.
He flatly refuses to create children; you seldom hear that, he is a doctor, an academic for one hundred percent.
One person gives his blood to save a person, injects himself to make people better, Hans refuses to bring fools into the world, he has enough already.
What a misery ... but I knew him ... I also knew for what reason he had accepted me.
Here science and man face each other.
Hans is a miracle to me.
However, I am ready.
I know why he has accepted me.
I also know that I do not need to make a fool of myself and him.
I know as well that Hans is not sitting waiting for me and that this faculty does not pay any attention to me and the thousands of others, because science cannot be any quackery.
Yet he is open to me as a man and as science: he knows the laws, he is a child of God, like me, a searcher, and a questioning child!
This is how I wanted to see him.
I may say that I had assessed him well.
Truly, I was afraid to go to sleep.
Yet I sunk away, let my daily consciousness completely free, and see, I tumbled of my own accord to the lowness, a world that is still unknown, like all the other things, which people know nothing about.
What is sleep?
I do not know!
What is the purpose of sleep?
People know that approximately, it is necessary for the body, for the soul and spirit.
However, what is all of that?
You could keep on asking questions.
It does not help you any.
When I am sleeping, you and I know nothing else.
However, now it began to shimmer for me, it was misty and my sleep was uncertain.
There I sought a way, I had to try to keep on my path, or I would come to grief.
What I saw and experienced I felt to be my possession.
It was therefore a world that I knew and which belonged to my life.
It remained misty ... all that night, and I had started my walk.
Is there no life here? I wondered.
Am I alone in this universe?
I called for an answer, did not hear anything and tried it again, no answer.
I continued to walk, and I went further through my dream.
It took an awful long time.
I had the feeling that I was on my way for days on end.
I felt the need to see what time it was.
I take my watch and look ... at that moment I awoke.
I was refreshed and truly awake as well.
I see that it is twelve o’clock.
I have slept half the day, nothing for me.
But what is the matter?
I start to think.
Here there is light, there it remained misty.
It remained misty, even if the sun came up, it became day.
I was in a world that is not part of this one.
I lived and could think ... I was completely normal.
What is it?
For days on end, I followed my dream, again and again.
Finally, I had solved the mystery before me.
I can probably satisfy Hans with something, I thought, but I have to say it of my own accord, I cannot find any words for it now.
However, it is wonderful ... even if there was mist, I was not staying in a heaven by any means.
All the same, I understood that all those fools were more or less a part of it.
Now that I am with Hans again, I have to wait a moment because he still has to treat a patient, and gives advice; I come back to his misery.
I am standing in his institution again, we follow all those fools, I can see them one for one.
A moment later, he greets me and we sit down.
He immediately asks the question:
“And, Frederik, any news?”
“I am busy.”
“Do you still think that they are supernatural?”
“I now know for certain, Hans.”
‘That is a revelation to me.
Tell me, Frederik, I am dying to know.”
“Could you not help me a bit, Hans?”
I will ask you questions.
In the first instance, this, Frederik: how do you get to super naturalness, how do you manage to say that my fools are supernatural?
I would like to know.”
Look ... an inner rumbling occurs, I say:
“I already told you, people like us experience the abnormal, the fools experience the true part, the laws of which we do not yet know.
I will tell you outright, Hans, do not expect any science from me, I am not yet that far.
When I was walking about with your people, and later, when I was alone, also when I was asleep, I went back to them, and I descended into their lives.
I saw these souls; I felt them.
To me it is the soul, the personality.
I now accept that people like us live in different degrees.
I would like to call it heights.
One person is further than another.
What we call normal for our consciousness, is really standing still in this space, the vested possession of the soul, as a result of which it has released itself from that madness.”
“In other words, Frederik, have we and others already experienced that insanity?”
“That is the way I see it!
I therefore call them supernatural, because they experience themselves as soul, of which conscious people like us do not possess anything, or, again, are precisely above it.
Our personality can deal with this society.
They still have to master our strengths.
However, they find themselves exactly in that which normal people like us closed off completely.
They experience something of the inner life, which we do not know, which we are searching for.
They live with a day conscious life, but that of the soul, the inner part, or, as Karel calls it, their nature!
That is the amazing part about it.
Just look at them.
All of them went to rack and ruin because of their longings.
All of them are faced with sexuality - I also saw the homosexual - yet others were destroyed by religion.
What we are following is temporary destruction.
God has nothing to do with all of this!!”
“I was walking that same night in a mist.
That world was universe!
I saw that there was no end.
I understood, Hans, that this had to do with your patients.
I made comparisons.
Then I saw the patients again.
I went after them.
I descended into their lives and experienced their mist.
I saw the day, our sunlight, and I wakened just before twelve o’clock.
The day had no power over that universe, and I concluded from it that this was the world of these souls.
I met René there a while ago.”
“What did you say?”
“I will now tell you.”
Hans listens, I am ready.
“What is the difference between that world and my patients?”
“Can you not sense that then?
René is more aware.
René does not walk in the mist, but René lives in another grade of life, his own world.
Yet, René is sick.
Your patients are less aware, they are also sicker, which we will later also see and determine when René is older.
Your patients, Hans, are different, but all of them now have to do with an own personality.
They are faced with this personality.
They have to do with it and they will not be released from it, because this is their universe.
Now they are faced with their own longings, experiencing some love, but they have come into rebellion, disharmony with this life, as a result of which they came to grief.
The weak people?
The weak-minded for our harsh life ... this society?
I accept it irrevocably, if you ask me.”
“It is possible, Frederik, but continue.”
“Your patients are not yet that far, Hans, that they can tolerate this life.
I see many kinds there.
If I look at human bodies, follow the races (see article ‘There are no races’ on rulof.org) on earth, and then I will be faced with these types of people.
We wondered why there are no lunatics living in the jungles?
Well, Hans, I believe that all these types of people are still busy striving for the stage reached by us.
I do not yet know, but to me there is a weak light, which says: these people will also experience our body one day.
These people will also go back to God and in this way we are faced with a natural fact, a law of justice!
Now it is not God, Hans, it is we ourselves!
The lunatics in our society have reached this height, but have succumbed.
Since I saw René in this world, I had to accept that conscious people like us are actually closed off to the state of purity.
So since these people - and René has to prove it to us, because I expect that this soul will give us the facts, because I heard him saying: ‘See you soon ...’ - are half-conscious to society. They find themselves in the space of the soul, and with all their passions, their love and human feelings, which you now determine as sexual desires, but which are very ordinary, after all, because all of us reach a different height through the creations.
I now bring that back in connection with other nations, the jungle stage, for example, where everyone has to accept the organic before they can actually start on the inner world.
Now thousands of worlds are coming to me.”
“In the first place, the soul lives more than once on earth.
If that is not the case, Hans, we will not get any further either and my foundations will be wrong.
I would then have to accept that the soul really comes back to the earth as a personality, because by experiencing all those nations, all those organisms, it goes higher and higher.
That therefore ties in completely with reincarnation.
If we can accept this, then we will be faced with a personality and it will no longer be nonsense that a mother can feel a beard while pregnant.
It is also not nonsense that a mother can predict beforehand that she is carrying a thief ... because we possess enough of them, but that it is given to her through the life, through the personality, because that personality is already present.”
“Continue; remember this.”
“If we definitely see foundations, Hans, then there will no longer be any mysteries for this condition and we can answer thousands of questions.
You can ask me them, I believe that I can sense the answer to them.
Your lunatics now find themselves in their own world.
As true as there are types of people, who all possess their own body, we also have to accept that the soul or the personality, if the body possesses that, can experience heights.
Therefore, also depths - and now you are faced with your patients.
When we come to character traits, to religion, then you will already know that these are weak people.
If we just move onto religion - I will soon explain to you how that is possible - and you will understand that I have understood you, then, you will dissolve completely.
When we now look at everything on earth, experience art, and bring about the very highest there, we will dissolve and it will become art.
We forget ourselves completely at that moment, but we create art with a capital A.
If a faithful soul now loses itself in God and does not continue to stand on its own two feet, it falls, it loses itself in its faith, in its love, in its whoring, or in sexual desires, then we get another picture.
Help me to remember that we will soon follow that line.
This dissolving, Hans, is the release from our so conscious self.
Those souls leave.
They lose this, no, they discard it.
Or they still have to achieve this consciousness.
In any case, they are sick to this world; they talk gibberish, and they are locked up.
Now we are faced with their misery, which ... God did not create, but we ourselves, since we lost ourselves in passions.
All artists experience that.
Now the dissolving is an art.
Have you any artists in your midst?”
“There are two.”
“What do those people do?”
“They play, they are terribly occupied with themselves ... but they are not the most difficult cases.”
“Well, they dissolved.
They lost themselves in their art and as a result of their dirty tricks ...
They have a delicate spirit and personality.
The religious maniacs, Hans, experience exactly the same thing.
They experience it through their faith, others through the loss of their possession, children.
I still see all those types in René’s environment, with the exception, as I already said, that René has the benefit of a higher consciousness.
I see René as a saint ... I see your patients as soiled, those come to grief, the weak people.
We still have to experience whether René is a weak person, I do not believe it!
Since I meet René in that world, which is therefore no longer a dream to me, I believe, if he remains unaware, that he will later reveal more and more to us, things of which neither you nor I will reach the depth, because we do not possess that sensitivity.”
“So you expect it from a fool?”
“I would like to ask you, Hans, who says to you that your patients are mad?
Anyone who lives just below daily consciousness is abnormal.
However, what is now normal and what is abnormal?
I do not yet know the answer to it.
I have therefore established for myself that if the soul behind this life, so death, is also a personality, everything can be explained which you academics are searching for.
Only then can you continue.
I established that we continue to live.
First of all, through René, then through your own patients, if I can accept the comparison that the soul has to experience all the organisms which the earth has created for us, nature, which now wants to be the space of this earth.
Only then will we perhaps continue.
I do not know whether we will then live in the hereafter.
However, René was there!
I was dreaming and René was also dreaming.
I met him there, he met me, and we are both completely healthy and conscious.
Although this is a dream, it might also be something different.
Yet then, Hans, we are faced with the world of the soul, which is a person, has eyes, possesses a body, can think, and what seems supernatural to us ... is spiritual awakening for there.
That must be the life for us as spirit!
I was walking there, I was as happy as a child, and I could ask René questions which the child answered as if everything was an everyday matter.
I thought it was a nice dream, with human inspiration, truthfulness.
I can tell you, Hans, that I have come a long way in this direction during the past few days.
Now about the sensations I experienced.”
I told Hans about my streetlight.
“You damned well felt it spot-on, Frederik.”
“You see, I do not take things lightly; I would rather beat myself.
I was just ready when I came to see you.”
“And that other thing, Frederik.”
“Well, Hans, if we can therefore accept that the soul continues in its world, we will be faced with the hells and the heavens.”
“What did you see?”
“Now we come to be faced with the spiritual consciousness, the kingdom of heavens or that of lower passions, the hells, which the Bible also mentions.
Well, I repeat, you can then accept that real spiritual influence exists.
You can then conclude that you do not fight against a person to make him better, but you are also faced with devils who have made themselves master of such a soul.
I can see two types of madness.
The first one is conscious spiritual destruction as a result of passions or losing oneself, it does not matter what the reason is, the next one as a result of spiritual possession!
If the soul loses itself, that does not necessarily mean possession.”
“I accept it immediately, Frederik.
It is an amazing thesis!”
“If we now come to the ultimate for what we know, then you can accept that the soul lives on as a spiritual personality, but then theosophists and spiritualists would be right!
Then many things are no longer nonsense, but a contact with people who died, with those who passed away.
However, I myself will not go into it yet, even if it is now a great mystery to me as a result of which this certainty comes to me, has come to me.
I just think, but since I am busy thinking, waves of thoughts bombard me and I get the answer after my own thoughts.
Is this inspiration? Erica asked me a while ago!
I could not say so.
I would far rather admit that she lost herself for a hundred percent in the game, even if I found her game the work of angels and a moment later bestial, since I felt all passions there, which a passionate person can experience and longs to experience.
I could also say: it was René!”
“Do you not understand that, Hans?”
“I cannot understand any of it.”
“You will see that it is very simple and as sure as anything, if I explain it to you.”
“Then do it.”
“Well ... I will connect you to the mother with the beard.
If she feels the beard, Hans, would another person not be capable of giving the mother who is open to art, the feeling for it and of sending it to her maternal daily consciousness?
Now imagine that the soul is a personality.
That personality is not unaware, the working in the mother is not nature, it is not deaf and dumb, but that working is a powerful personality and gives that possession to the mother.
If that is not the case, then it is also possible that Franz Liszt himself played through her, so through Erica.”
“It is a revelation to me, Frederik, how you now analyse things.
However, I do not understand that part about René.”
“It is not so simple either.
I am starting to feel it and then the thoughts come.
If I go back to the time when Erica was expecting, then I can see that she was thrown completely out of balance as a mother, which Karel calls ‘process’ or ‘nature’.
Now I am faced with the different mothers.
I let myself be convinced that there are childish mothers and also man mothers.
One group is oversensitive; the other group is as rough as a roustebout, even if I do not wish to say anything wrong about these people.
If there is also a delicate personality like the one of a child, which Erica is not, then phenomena occur as a result of which Dr. Ten Hove, Dr. Van Stein and Dr. Van Hoogten worked themselves to the bone.
However, there were phenomena.
The suicidal thoughts of Erica represent weakness of the personality.
Karel says: do not put on such an act, thousands of mothers experience exactly the same.
But can you not feel then, Hans, that Erica did not want those phenomena?
Did you really think that all those mothers ask for those troubles?
The strong characters cannot be influenced!
They remain themselves and nothing happens to these souls either.
They deal with motherhood in a natural way, do not fall, and there is nothing which disturbs them.
Now descend with me into the depth of the soul.
Accept that one of these three degrees of feeling, because this is how I see it, as a mother carries a personality in her that will later be completely mad.
Such a dominant personality forces the mother to accept its own world of thoughts and that therefore happens, because the phenomena visibly destroy or interrupt the day- consciousness of the mother.
Now that has put the cat among the pigeons.
Erica, only just touched by René, is no longer herself.
Other mothers are, for example, connected to, completely one with a murderer.
The soul goes on, has to go on.
God gives us the opportunity to continue our human life in His direction.”
“When you see this theory founded before you, Frederik, you will have worked it out.”
“I think so too, but then we will be faced with a universal truth.
It will mean a revolution for your science, and every spiritual faculty will receive a higher consciousness.
There will no longer be religious maniacs.”
“I now understand that you cannot yet think, cannot analyse.
Do you not feel then, Hans, that when the soul as a person on earth knows God, knows about its own previous existence, learns the natural laws, the university will obviously call a natural halt to it.
When the soul knows that it is capable of attracting a new life here, can become a mother, that it sees its lost life again after death, it will not fall.
All those lunatics of yours have lost their material contact because the personality does not know the natural way.
Those souls are not weak as people, Hans, it is we who have informed them wrongly.
Now follow a theologian like that, follow the church, what is an academic, who talks about damnation?
Has the man nothing else to give his lunatics?
For they are also abnormal beings, I do not believe that God sends His life to the earth to destroy it there and to make it mad.
It is we ourselves!
The spiritual faculties are all standing at a dead point!
You cannot continue, because you do not know the soul.
If the theologian can explain the laws of my ‘university’ to his followers, the laws of the soul, the inner life as a being will fly over the mountains and will see the eternal there now!
What breaks a person comes about through ignorance.
It is ignorance, Hans, which breaks them.
This is why there is so much searching.
Everyone wants to know something about God, know Him and themselves, but all those people do not know where to start.
If they start anyway, then it is the same old story: mad, or unconscious and conscious deceit.
Then into your institution.
What we have to follow are the phenomena of René and of your patients.
It is they who will give us foundations.
Religious mania or mania as a result of art or broken love, you see, it all says so little, but they all went towards their darkness as a result of ignorance.
I see all those illnesses again in one person!
All of us have some of the abnormal, we are not conscious!
Even if we think that we are adults, childish youth does not exist for the soul.
There are no little children in the universal thought; the soul is primeval!
In my opinion, it has lived millions of times.
However, we are not yet at that stage!
The soul became a personality.
And this, Hans, is what we do not yet know the laws and the space of.
Is this all news to you?
I do not know, but I see the foundation there.
Sometimes you find those foundations in the street gutters of a town.
Wherever you look, you see them.”
“If we now come to considering the phenomena, then you will see, Hans, that everything revolves around the natural consciousness.
The lunatics therefore now experience the laws of the soul, not our laws of this rotten society, but precisely those which, under day conscious thinking and feeling represent an own world.
This is why I call them supernatural, because each thought which occurs from the life of the soul, possesses that depth and infinity.
One human thought, Hans, it does not matter what it is devoted to, possesses a universal depth and also possesses its own attunement, which is again supernatural.
It is not so strange now, that a lunatic, in whatever degree he finds himself, is busy releasing himself from the inner world of feelings, as a result of which the materialisation then occurs, which takes the abnormal straight to the natural society.
If no religion had existed, then there would not be any religious maniacs either.
Do you not feel then that this illness will immediately dissolve?
If the theologian reflects, feels what he is faced with, and gets to know his patients, his world will be even more rotten, even more unconscious than your world.
If we enter the church, then we will be faced with the same laws.
Since God still damns, places the soul as His child before eternal flames, victims fall.
Since the personality of the church itself is still unconscious, there are religious fanatics!
You as academics now have to try to give their patients, their people, whom they have butchered in such an amazingly natural way, have broken inside, new life and another consciousness.
Those things, Hans, are lying in the street gutters of your town.
And thousands of other divine matters, which people have completely raped, as a result of which this chaos emerged!
What should we do for your institution?
It does not live and lie with you.
We have to do more for parapsychology than for any other scientific subject, it is that faculty which cures the patients instantly and gives them a divine, but human mind.
You think that you are right, I tell you: you do not think!
You are unconscious and will never make it.
It is all talk with you, and nothing else.
It is the same as throwing in the towel, making God out to be a cad and so on.
What you can do is to lay notes with the bodies in which you call Him to human justice in order to put Him in prison.
Or you will hang Him!
That is all!
I know that if you can devote your life to these souls, another can inject himself with the substance discovered by him in order to achieve his objective, you will do that!
Doing everything for his patients is wonderful, but that is not the point.
If you say, Hans, that there are already more than enough lunatics - I am now hitting you with your own words - that is the worst gibberish which I have ever heard; it is so trivial, so awkward, that my own clumsiness is just child’s play in comparison.”
“How do you mean, Frederik?”
“How do I mean?
Do you not know then?
Can you no longer think?
Are you already so dopey, is your brain suffocating?
Are you full to the brim?
Can you not carry on?
I do not believe you.
It proves that you academics do not possess any depth.
If people see you, you are walking about with ten pairs of glasses and six hats and then you still ask where all those things went to.
I tell you, Hans, if I was so forgetful in my way of thinking, when I am busy looking for a way out in this, then you could have put me along with your patients some time ago, but I saw myself that I would not come there.
You forget everything!
You think purely from nature!
You start to throw things upside down and you do not see that you are right next to the mask and that the thing, precisely this thing, can tell you all about it.
Your world of thoughts is so rotten as can be, people should first teach you to think.
You make thousands of analyses, but you do not make it through them!
You become stranded somewhere and then you just continue.
You think up something, but you do not touch the basics.
It is because of this that, when people talk about problems, you immediately reach for your head, because you think it will burst.
However, it will not burst, you are thinking wrong!
Those foundations for your study are no good either.
You have to learn to think during the initial years and then you will come to the actual study.
I do it differently ... you will see, I will soon let my people explain how a natural law is composed.”
“But why do you think my attitude is clumsy, Frederik?”
“Thank you, Hans, you are now proving that you are starting to think.
I had not yet forgotten that problem.
Do not think that I am conceited, or am becoming so.
Does the doctor not understand then ... that he has not a single divine law in his hands?
Does the doctor not understand that it does not matter a jot to God whether you want to procreate?
How awkward you are, how clumsy and naïve, Academic, because it is not in your hands.
It proves to me that you are not thinking things through.
After all, my friend, if you did not give life to the lunatic, therefore no body, the soul would stand still in its universal development.
You would prevent evolution!
Then there would be no more lunatics, but then this world would stop!
How would we, how would those millions of souls be able to develop?
That is only possible on earth, in the material world, through the material laws!
This is why I can tell you - and now you have to listen carefully, Hans, you will now get a lesson from me - that a lunatic is normal and that people like us possess abnormal phenomena, our whole behaviours is mad!
We flatly refuse to give the soul a body.
Then God will say: okay, get on with it, idiot ... but then I will have to give one mother twenty children, then she will have to do the work of another who is too lazy for it and even sends My life back through a trick, fling it in My face.
Did you think, Hans, that God the Almighty, or the Omnipresence, however you wish to call Him, pays any attention to your homosexuality?
He does not worry about what you do with your seed, because He gives another the double capacity, simply increases this, because you, and many along with you, refuse!
I can now see behind this mask!!!
I am starting to see that everything is very different!
I am starting to see, Hans, that your world of thoughts is so trivial.
Even if you think that you will later make the grade of professor, it does not mean you are anything special.
You refuse to give your powers to breeding.
Fine, that is your own business.
I am not yet that far, but when I get the chance, I will knock you down!
Then you will not need to kill me, doctor, but then I will knock you to the ground with my vested possession, which is not of this world!
Oh, good heavens, what a lot is bombarding me.”
“For heavens sake, carry on and remember it, Frederik.”
“It is easy for you to talk, but I have already worked it out.
I can now see and feel, Hans, that I am starting to think for thousands of people.
Everyone can make it through, can receive wisdom, can see behind the masks, but then not as we think and wish to do, in a way which is shown to you by the nature of Karel and his process.
I am starting to think for you and I will get my information because I have to do the work for all those men who flatly refuse to think along His lines, are too tired, too unhappy to see behind the mask.
For this reason you must be prepared to lose yourself, or it will not work!”
“Do you understand, Hans, that you cannot stop creation?”
“And you yourself then, Frederik?”
“That is a very different matter.
The reason why I am not married is that I am not awakened to it.
My body does not long for polygamy; I have no desire for that.
My soul and personality do not consider it either.
And that takes me to René.
Only now am I starting to think that this child can mean a miracle.”
“What makes you think that?”
“Well, doctor, now that I have to occupy myself with these things in this world, I get this as a task as it were, I consider René, his soul, as a part of the supernatural, for which it was born then.
I am starting to see a connection, I am starting to feel that there are lunatics with supernatural powers, only for - and now you will hear it - the possession of these feelings, if this was not the case, then the soul would be like us: dead!”
Thank God, it has been said.
“What a terrible shame that all those words will be lost, Frederik.
I will fetch a stenographer.”
“How stupid you are again, Hans.
Did you think that I could then talk like this?
In addition, it is not necessary, because what is now being sown, what I now utter, will come later also when I am sitting quietly in my room and get round to writing down all these things
I want to tell you that the soul is on the earth for a certain purpose.
If a lunatic has to experience sickly phenomena, then that is for a development, which concerns itself.
As far as René is concerned, I tell you honestly: I do not yet know. However, my dream or my experience is taking me in that direction ... the soul as being, so this child, was conscious and could state: ‘I will come back, Uncle Frederik ... you are now a bit ahead of me, but I will catch up with you again.
How is that possible, Hans?”
“I do not know.”
“There is just one possibility, Hans.
René is growing up!
I am now ahead of him in age, in material growth, but that means nothing.
Soon soul and body will reach adulthood and then I hope that we will experience more, may receive more from this patient, because not all the lunatics of this world are naturally insane, one person is sickly insane, destroyed himself, another person, Hans, gets supernatural things as a result and is a supernatural being to me!”
We do not say a single word for half an hour.
Hans is broken by it.
He has a few drinks and I also have a few.
It does me good.
It is already late, but we have not yet worked it out.
Then he says:
“It is incredible, Frederik.
You have already elevated a university by your analyses; your analyses are amazing.
You are right!
I already think differently about it.
I am an unconscious person.
I have to look for a girl.
I am vegetating!
My God, how can it be?
That is because of you, whom all of us thought to be an idiot.
For heavens sake, continue.
If I can be of any assistance to you, you know: I put all my possessions in your hands.
It is terrible!
Yet, despite everything, spiritualists and theosophists could be right.
That of the theologians is so true that I could shout it from the roof tops how happy I am, if those people were not so sad through and through.
Man, what a misery, what poverty, what triviality.
I am a doctor, and I am a psychiatrist?
I will hang up my coat on the pegs tomorrow and give it up!”
“Then I will just go home.
Everything has been for nothing and I do not intend to waste any more of my time.
All the best.”
“You are not serious, Frederik.”
“Am I serious, Hans?
I am already leaving ...”
“But you cannot leave just like that.”
“Sit down, if I may say so ... we will have something to eat.”
We continue talking.
I have my viewpoints, he has to represent and defend his.
“What is laid aside for your life, Hans, is now already coming forward.
You must make it to a professor.
Through your study you can lay other foundations, I will lay mine under yours.
We are going one way.
I do it my way and you through your faculty.
That is what is desired from us, we do not mess with divine tasks; you came here to do everything you could achieve, if you want to give another life later to these poor patients.
You will marry and attract children, or make them, however you wish to call it.
You will be and will have to live as natural as possible, if you wish to open your inner doors for higher thoughts and feelings.
This life, which you now possess, does not mean a thing to me!
You are off track, and you have become loose from the divine anchor!
You will continue, just as I.
It does not matter who will win.
However, I will keep to our agreement.
It is not your business what I do; we will see each other from time to time.
We will have to wait and see whether you will later be of the same opinion.
I do not think so!”
“So you are doubting me?”
“Not for what you will serve, but there is still so much ... you also feel like some of that crazy love!
You will give your personality to another and then, Hans, you will be on the bolt for a time, you will float there where I was, where René lives, that is between heaven and earth, and you will feel how these two started kissing.
Then you will forget everything!
However, that is your way, if you do not follow it, you will succumb under your study.
You are too good a doctor!
As far as I am concerned, I will continue, I have to continue!
You will see, you will notice from everything that my thoughts cannot be wrong.
If we compare the spiritualist interpretation and the accompanying theosophical way of thinking and give a place as principles for the universal university, which will then get the name which I already know, then we will be faced with another and higher awakening, which will be given to us by your lunatics.”
“What is the name, Frederik?”
“It is still too soon for that.
I do not even want to think about it.
I do not look at the eggs which have been lying in the sun for a day, I do not get a hold of them and I do not touch broods which experience the natural process in that silence and which people like us must leave alone.
That will come later!
I now know that I am on the right path.
There are no mantraps or clamps there.
Those I kick away from the start.
I am not skating on thin ice, I am going directly to a lunatic and he will give me the proof.
Your opinions of life, Hans, have no natural basis.
You have to see things in a different way.
For many the mask has already been made transparent.
I am starting to appreciate René.
If you consider everything, it is a machine calculated beforehand, which has been put together artistically.
It is a jigsaw puzzle, Hans, which we are part of, as well as the Catholic Church and the other spiritual faculties.
Faith plays an enormous part.
I believe that you now know where the fire is really burning.
We have to put that fire out, we have to start there, otherwise, it will still be burning there in a thousand year’s time.
That is not the intention.
We did not receive our humane way of thinking and feeling for nothing, we should use that to create a better society.
I consider the fact that we have come together as a natural law.
It does not matter to me whether coincidence already exists on earth and for this life.
However, I believe that coincidence can no longer exist if you look behind the masks.
For making this jigsaw puzzle already started there!
It is the soul as a human being, Hans, which has universal meaning!
It is not yet in its hands, but that will come!
It is the soul, which together with its built-up personality helps this world progress.
That is we people.
However, through the normal social, to the abnormal spiritual, which is already as normal to me as a fruit on a tree, because the soul as a person sees its infinity before it!
Now try saying that everything, which a mother has to experience during her pregnancy, is nonsense, I tell you, they are supernatural phenomena.
The soul as a personality experiences the new awakening.
That is how it will be!
I do not believe otherwise, or we will never make it!
René is already walking on older legs.
If it is an ordinary dream, Hans, without the spiritual concept of justice, I mean, apart from everything, experiencing confusion, then everything will go to pieces on its own.
However, if the soul is already capable of this, because it possesses that sensitivity, for which I do not yet have a name, that means that René has supernatural gifts and will be a spiritual child prodigy.”
“Now you are exaggerating.”
“Time will tell, Hans.
Have you perhaps heard of spiritual child prodigies?”
“Not me, if I understand what you mean, at least.”
“We have talents, Hans.
I see that as a division.
That talent as a child, Mozart, for example, possessed material talent.
That child made music by fashioning notes.
Almost all child prodigies represent the material talent - we have still not seen a single one of the inner aspects, the soul.
Therefore, that means that a child prodigy like that could bring problems for you and your colleagues because of his talent.
I call that a spiritual child prodigy.
You need years for that study, Hans.
If a child prodigy like that was born, what would you say then?”
“It is impossible, then that would have happened long ago, would it not?”
“So, should I disillusion you?
What would this world do with a child prodigy in a spiritual sense?
Fifty, no, thirty years ago these souls would have been burnt at the stake as miracles.
The church did that!
If God were really concerned with us, I would have to say: ‘Man, you spotted that well.’
If we had see spiritual child prodigies walking the earth in those days, that would only have been temporary anyway, because the church considered it the work of the devil, and I could say to God: ‘God, what an idiot you are!’
However, God knows what He is doing!
He does not send anything too soon to this world.
It is different, I already said, but that will come.
Now look at a child prodigy like that, Hans, and say what you think.”
“That is easy to explain, Frederik.
You are becoming completely stuck.
Today René is ill, completely mad, you say yourself that there are phenomena, an hour later it is a supernatural being and now even a spiritual child prodigy.
I do not understand it anymore, honestly I do not!”
“Now you think that you have got me, don’t you?”
“That is not my point, for that matter, you know better than that and we should not even talk about it.
However, what do you think?
Should I now let myself be undressed, should I then throw all the knowledge I obtained overboard?
Does what was achieved not mean anything more to us?
This is not science, Frederik; you will never be allowed to forget that you want to treat science from your layman’s existence.
Now you are faced with a doctor again ... my faculty and the other one, for which I vouch ... because now it is a great chaos!”
“Is there more to come, Hans?”
“Not that, but can you not sense yourself that this is no longer acceptable?”
I may accept this, now we will start!
You must now accept that you really do not understand a word of it.
You have your studies to thank for that.
I now know that I must thank God that I did not follow a study ... not for others, but only for myself, otherwise the world would stand still.
However, for certain things you must not be spoiled by a university or a school, born talent is spoiled there.
Or do you not believe that either?
If a born talent as a painter is completely dissolved in the academic carry-on, that same talent will also be broken.
However, you do not accept that.
Now a spiritual prodigy like that.
You stand for René, Hans; I stand for your lunatics.
If those souls have started to look around, sometimes see apparitions, say things which you do not understand a word of, you think, that is part of the lunatic.
However, I have already explained that lunatics can think supernaturally.
Every word of such a lunatic, which stands above the normal in and of our lives, is a part of that amazing world where we will all go and which you look for as if colour-blind.
Every word, which just exceeds our material consciousness, is a part of that supernatural world and a part of the universe that the soul as a person possesses and of which he does not yet know the fireworks.
Now I believe that René is sick.
Of course, there are phenomena.
However, is every researcher who comes with something new not declared insane by science?
I call that conscious insanity.
Those people, Hans, are miracles, later they were understood and then it is called: how stupid we were!
What meant illness and insanity to you later appeared to be a supernatural phenomena.
When Galilei said that the earth revolved around the sun, this genius was locked up.
And just as many others were burnt, hung!
They were all child prodigies!
Some were earlier than others, but they were all child prodigies.
Those children were all conscious and unconscious, they served as great people, but strived for one goal, to give this rotten humanity more beauty, for which they were killed one by one.
In this way, the earth received art - and also science!
That is also art!
If I go back to René, then I see that his phenomena will be developed exactly as a result of this illness.
However, it will no longer be an illness, it will now be the preparation for later: awakening, development, and the natural evolution of the soul for spiritual sciences.
What is now an illness is art to the soul!
René already knows that!
I am now also starting to see my dream in a different way.
I experience these miracles, yesterday I still saw the lot still in the wrong way or I did not yet dare to start on it.
Rene is a child prodigy, a spiritual genius, for which we shall soon receive the proof.
Then you may cut me into pieces and I will give you the knife myself, you can do what you like with me!
I am therefore challenging you again, Hans.
René will prove that, I will prove mine!
However, we are both mad ... still; soon, this will have a different name; it has received a different name, which, however, means the same thing.
It is the soul and along with it all its vested possession, consciousness!
The reason you are still stuck to your science and doctorate is that you have to!
If you lose both your legs, you will not be worth a thing to science.
I like you like this, because this is the path, the way to make it!
Every thought that a lunatic experiences, I just said, is to conscious people like us walking next to the creation in which the illness lives.
As a soul, he sees his own phenomena.
Do not bring any religion or passion into it, or sexual desires and so on, that has nothing to do with René’s condition.
His soul, his personality, is conscious, but abnormal to this world.
We have not yet experienced anything through the child, but a person can do this, because the soul, just as we, has to grow to maturity only then the gifts will develop.
His head is too big; I admit that.
But what does it matter?
Yet, we will experience strange things.
One thing is not clear to me and that is ... why does such a genius not come to the world as normal.
Why through an illness?
I already answered that question myself a moment ago, yet I think it is strange.
Of course, that is because I have lost the thread.
I see it living there; I can follow it, but not explain it.
What is it?”
“Make some effort, Frederik.”
“You have no part of yourself to devote to this, Hans, you cannot help it, at least, if that storm comes to you of its own accord.
If you start on it as a layman, then you will break your neck over the cracks, for which I now say, ‘no thanks’.
No, I cannot see it; perhaps it will come.
But wait ... I have already worked it out!”
“What is it?”
“Listen, dear scholar ... I will give you a theory, so not science ...!
Since there have not yet been any child prodigies in a spiritual sense, René is the first one for the whole of the world ... a supernatural human child.
He begins, the first one, also on the first step ... has to adjust, has to go through the abnormal to the conscious self!
Now I feel, Hans, that you find this childish, but just carry on.
When that school, if I may call it that, is further, has laid a bit more foundations, the next spiritual child prodigy will feel released from all this misery.
Then a struggle for it will no longer be necessary.
This sounds very awkward, does it not, but then I will confront you with the next fact.
How did the occult laws, the schools, come into existence?
How did Egypt reach that height?
I was led to believe that at least a hundred thousand priests failed before people there knew something about a next life.
Masses of people failed before the first spiritual word was spoken.
However, when it was finally at the stage where they had achieved that, Hans, only then did those people, who were certainly no fools, receive the universal reality!
And that is our culture?
Is it so crazy that they start to make doctors of them?
Is an Egyptologist perhaps mad?
If you meet such a doctor, Hans, will you declare him mad?
Will you laugh at his study?
Just put an end to it: you have become unacceptable yourself!
No, I am telling you, people there also started at the ground, there they also had to get hold of stone by stone and add it to the whole according to the rules of art, which received light and shape through those first thousands.
Now René again.
He lives here in the sensible West.
What do we know about spiritual miracles?
About occult laws?
To me they are everyday matters, because if you fall asleep, you are experiencing an occult law just as well as a fakir from the East.
Human sleep, Hans, if you wish to know, is an occult law, because we do not know sleep.
It belongs to the inner life, even if the material experiences the action.
Everything, which belongs to the soul, you know that yourself anyway, even if you did not know what I am now telling you, is spiritual reality.
It does not matter whether that reality also belongs to the darkness, or that it is whore-like, walks naked, suffers from religious mania, it is of no significance, it concerns the inner actions, the spiritual aspects of the soul, which form its world and personality!
Can you now understand some of it?
René is sick, to us, not to himself!
René’s head is too big?
I think through an inner force.
Can you sense this?
Then you will start to think of inner awakening, a separate set of brains, but not those as you academics see them.
René’s brains are in his stomach.
His brains are situated there where the soul begins to think.
Just follow the human machine and you will know.”
Another half an hour passes in silence ...
I see that it is half past two; the time has flown by.
I am not yet empty, and I feel that there are still a few grams of movement left in order to get me to talk.
I actually do not know what we were talking about, but I can see that there is light in the rooms of my castle and that all the doors have been opened wide.
Finally, Hans says:
“I give up for just now.
I cannot find a flaw in that argument, but I really hope that you will be proved right.
It is a revelation to me and I know that I have to start to see many things in a different way, also for myself, as far as my social life is concerned.
You have gone up in my esteem, Frederik.
I will think about it and even if it takes a while: I will work it out.
Thank you for your lecture, it was worthwhile.”
I am outside again.
I go straight into the woods.
I will no longer see any ghosts.
Peace comes to me ...
It is as if the whole universe is talking to me and says: carry on, there has been talk for long enough about damnation, and that has to stop now!
Only then will the religious maniacs be proved right.
This is the way it is, I feel, if those theologians had not been so stupid, then Hans and the others could have made dance schools from their institutions, now there is misery.
If people would understand their love a little better, then there would be no more homosexuals (see article ‘Homosexuality’ on rulof.org).
Yet, if I start about that I will be standing still again.
One thing strikes me and that is, I believe, my own salvation, namely the aid in order to think.
If I think of something that I do not yet know, or which is different, then I suddenly stand still inside.
Something then refuses inside and I notice that I do not yet know, at least I do not yet have an explanation for it.
However, I will get an explanation yet.
But what is it?
I repeat ... and see human love.
I see a large hole.
Is that also being kept for later?
If people - now it is becoming lost again - understood their love better, then there would be no homosexuality (see article ‘Homosexuality’ on rulof.org).
I think that I can feel it, you have to see it as something unnatural, but with a hint of suspicion!
These people do not understand their love, of course, otherwise they would be geared up differently, then a woman would not love a woman, but then she would ask as a natural greyhound and a dove, it’s possible, for a bit more of that other crazy love.
Yet so human, so completely natural!
Love ... love ... how are you born?
What is love?
What is the feeling when people love another or something else?
It is sawdust, desert sand, it slips through your fingers, but they are human problems, they will become the pillars of science, my foundations!
What a child Hans still is.
I am happy.
Not because I was able to confront him with my facts, but because he is also a scholar.
He has to fight for his own possession or it will lead to a dead end.
I bet that we will see him engaged later and probably guarded from much misery, or perhaps exactly the other way round.
Is he also prepared for love?
We also have to be ready for that.
If we are not, blows will follow.
I am curious how he will solve that problem.
If you ask me ... I still expect something!
I do not believe that I am far off the mark; I am proved right in many things!
Now that is also science!
René is now a miracle to me.
Whether that will remain so?
I do not go into it.
I have to experience my own life, he his world.
However, we will continue.
The curtain has now been up for an hour and three-quarters.
There were only the two of us on the stage, Hans and I.
The tension in the hall was great, and we felt that we were both being applauded: one not less than the other.
The dear public has never heard anything like it before ...
Great, it is interesting, you can do comedy and you can do science at the same time.
The doors are also wide open for the following productions.
However, we carry on, towards the last acts ...
How will it end?
The answer lives in your heart; ...do you want some of that crazy love?